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Alex and Laura's Typical Married Day (R-rated at parts)

* guest posting enabled *

8 June 2008, 09:03 AM   #1
Guest Poster
There's some naked parts and then eventually a tiny sexual part, so beware if that
bothers you.  This is an old story and the writing was all "cutesie" for the girl I wrote
this for since that's how we used to talk online to eachother (I'm Alex and Laura's my

The beautiful princess wakes up…	

	And so…  Laura, a sweet pure hearted girl, woke up like all the other mornings..  She was
in Alex’s arms in their big very comfy bed, wearing Jammies; her face on his chest with
his head on the top of her head, and she heard the sound of light kisses, and felt her
hair being gently stroked too, she felt so good and comfy… She heard the quiet kissing
noises for Alex was kissing the top of her head a lot, softly; and he was gently stroking
Laura’s beautiful hair..  Alex smiled so much, because Laura smiled out of her comfy ness
and rubbed her head against his chest a little, and put her arms around him more and
squeezed tight!

Alex loves his Laura honey…	

	Alex spoke softly “Oh, so Very good morning Honey!!!  I woke up 2 hours ago, I was going
to wake you up, but I got too distracted kissing your head and stroking your incredibly
beautiful hair…  Laura honey…-”, And just then his eyes started getting watery..  “Oh
Laura Honey, I love you so much, So much!!!  I didn’t think it was this strong, but you’re
just so much of EVERYTHING good, honey you don’t know much I love you, oh I love you so
much!!!”  And he looked down and saw Laura’s eyes..  Her eyes were so beautiful, her hair
was so beautiful, her arms, hands, legs, all of her were so incredibly unimaginably
beautiful, along with her voice..  But Ha, they were nowhere as extremely beautiful of how
her personality is and how she is inside!

~Getting Laura ready in the Morning~

	He sat Laura on the bed, and he kissed her lips.  He got out a brush and went behind her
and started to brush her hair with it.  Then he went to pour cereal in a bowl and a drink
in a cup..  He put a spoon in the cereal and walked to Laura and sat down next to her, he
put cereal into the spoon and put it to her mouth and in it, and he continued to feed her
like that..  Alex put the bowl by the sink, and came back in.  He went to where Laura
honey’s clothes are and got out some of her clothes and put them by her.  Alex moved Laura
so she was laying and half way off the bed, and Alex slid her Jammie bottoms off, and her
panties, and put another pair of panties on her and slid normal pants on her.  Then he sat
her up and she lifted her arms and Alex took off her shirt, and put a bra or whateverrrrrr
on her and a shirt with Simba on it, saying, “I am Simba, Roar!”  For, Alex wants Laura to
do no work at all; he wants to do everything possible for her!  Alex went and changed

They leave the house.


He carried her in his arms, and looked at her eyes, and kissed her lips..  He carried her
outside to the car and put her in, and buckled her seatbelt.  Alex drove them to the mall.
 They entered and anything Laura wanted, he bought no matter WHAT.  And he’d buy a lot of
things for her by himself, and hid them until they got in the car.   He also bought ice
cream for her, and went to the theatre and watched whatever Laura wanted to see.  When
Laura didn’t want to walk, he’d carry her everywhere.  Alex always seemed obsessed with
hugging her and kissing her, he did it a lot, everywhere; it was just hard not to, he just
had to kiss her cute little cheek and lips whenever she talked or anything, she’s just so
perfect, in every way possible…  They left and went to a restaurant; he ordered what Laura
wanted for her, and fed her all the food for her…  And he couldn’t help but kiss her
extremely adorable little cheek and huggle her!  Then they went home.

~We’re home~ 

	It’s almost Bath time!  He buckled her up again, and rolled down her car window if she
wanted it down.  They went back home and it was 7pm.  He unbuckled Laura’s seatbelt and
opened their car doors and he shut his car door of course, and Laura’s car door for her. 
Then he ran to the house’s door, unlocked it and opened it, then ran back and carried
Laura and she giggled, into the house.  It was about Bath time, so he went in the bathroom
and turned on the water at a good temperature.  He carried Laura in their bedroom and sat
her on a chair and he made the bed and puffed out the pillows and checked to see if his
pillows seemed more comfortable than Laura’s, and if they were then he’d give Laura them
instead.  He went and kissed Laura and huggled her.  

~Going in the Bath tub~


The water was about done filling up the bathtub, so he put his hands around right above
the top of her feet and she knew to put them up, and she did.  He took Laura’s pants off
and slid her panties off, then she put her arms up and he took her shirt off andd undid
her bra or whateverrr.  He unchanged himself.  He put his incredibly sweet darling into
his arms and carried her to the bathroom and sat her onto the toilet seat, which had a rug
likies on it.  He turned off the water and got out bath oils and put them in the water,
and made it have bubbles.  He carried Laura and slowly put her in the tub; he went in

Washing Laura’s Beautiful, Pretty, Face..


	He grabbed a pink spongy thingy and put the liquid soap “body wash” thingy onto it, and
had it in his right hand.  Then he looked at Laura’s oh so very pretty eyes, and put his
arms around her and put his face on the left of her face, on her left shoulder.  He
started washing the bottom right of her chin for a little, then slowly up the right of her
face and her cheek, and his face turned to her left cheek and softly kissed it several
times, slowly..  He washed the back of her neck and his face went to the front of her neck
and top of her chest and he slowly rubbed his cheek against it, and turned forward it and
kissed from the top of her chest, up her neck, slowly and gently; as he started washing up
the back of her neck to the back of her head.  He moved his face to her right cheek and
started to softly kiss it as he started washing her left cheek, and under her chin, then
neck.  He looked at her eyes and washed all of her face, and he leaned his face forward
and started to very softly kiss her lips several times.

8 June 2008, 09:04 AM   #2
Guest Poster
Last edited by NovelWriter, 8 June 2008
~Washing Laura’s Beautiful Legs~


	He stopped kissing her and went back a little, and she lifted her right leg (which would
be on the left of Alex’s point of vision likies) up from the water, and Alex put the
spongy thing on part of her leg, and started to slowly wash all of her leg, as Alex went
to her foot and started to kiss it softly still, and part of the top of her big toe went
in his mouth as he licked right below it, and he closed his lips around her toe and closed
his eyes and slowly rubbed it against his tongue, as he continued to wash her right leg.. 
Then he finished washing it and he slowly opened his eyes as her toe slowly went out of
his mouth..  She lifted her other leg, and washed it as he slowly kissed her foot
everywhere, and licked it a little; and eventually he finished washing it and he gently
put her leg back into the water.

~Washing Laura’s Beautiful Arms~


	Alex put his left arm in the water and grabbed Laura’s right arm from the water and
brought it out of the water and put it so her hand was on top of the bottom of his hand. 
He put his face down and kissed her pretty hand, and washed her hand and up her arm, and
as he washed up her arm, he moved his body up more.  When it was coming close to her
shoulder/armpit, he put his face to her shoulder and softly kissed it, and rubbed his hand
up her armpit and a little down her arm, and stared at her sweet, beautiful, arm; and he
oh so very softly kissed up the top of her arm, up to her shoulder, and he licked the side
of her shoulder and put her lips on her shoulder and licked the upper side of her
shoulder.  Then he gently put her arm down into the water and brought up her other arm and
washed it and her hand, as he put her hand onto his incredibly lucky right cheek, as he
stared into her eyes…  And eventually he went to her armpit and started licking it, while
putting his arms around her; and when he was done washing her arm, he put her arm down
into the water a little while still licking her underarm…  He eventually slowly pulled his
tongue away from under her sweet arm…

~Washing Laura’s Beautiful Backie and Bummie~


	And then, Laura turned over and cutely put her hands on the bottom of the tub and pushed
up, so her back went up and it went down until the end of her back was in the water.  Alex
went up and put his right cheek onto her back and put her arms around her and rubbed his
cheek against her back, then lifted his face up and kissed around the bottom of her back a
little, with his arms still around her; and then licked it a little, and he put his arms
so they weren’t around her anymore and he stopped licking and started to wash her back.
Then Laura cutely again put her adorable butt out of the water, and he washed it; and the
top of her legs, and the er, genital area of her’s.  

~Washing Laura’s Beautiful Front, Alex Really Loves Laura!! <3~


	Then Laura turned over, and Alex stood up, and she slowly did; which Alex helped her. 
Alex walked behind her with his face on her right shoulder, and he started to wash her
tummy and chest, as he started kissing the right side of her neck and had his other arm
around her.  Then Laura turned over, and they looked in each other’s eyes, and Alex
started to put his arms around her, and Laura put hers around him, as they came slowly
closer to each other, and their lips eventually touched, and they felt incredibly warm and
in love; as they slowly entered each other’s mouths..  They touched and gently rubbed each
other’s tongue with their own tongue, and felt so good and warm and incredibly in love… 
As they did this, they rubbed each other’s back, which Alex still had the sponge thing in
his hand and washed more of her back and top of her bum and shoulders and arm and
everywhere.  Eventually they pulled apart, and their faces were all bright red and blushy…
 Alex dropped his sponge and put both of his hands on the bottom sides of her face, and
kissed all of her cute blushy parts of her face, and when his neck was by Laura’s, Laura
would gently lick it…

~Washing Laura’s Heavenly Hair~


	Laura grabbed the sponge and when it was about to touch Alex’s chest, he looked at her
and shook his head left and right as a no sign, because he didn’t want her to do any work.
 He washed himself.  As he did, he looked at the top of her head and it came across his
head that he didn’t wash her hair yet.  And so, when he finished, he put a hand behind her
knee, and one on her back, and sat her down in the tubbie, and he sat down in it too.  And
then thought ‘Eep’ and put her in front of him, in between his legs.  He filled a cup on
the side of the tub with some of the water, and Laura put her head back; and he dumped the
water on her hair to get it wet.  He grabbed the Shampoo and rubbed it in his hands, and
then rubbed it into her hair; and filled the cup and dumped the water on her hair a couple
times again.  They were both washed, after a whole seven paragraphs.  

~Drying Beautiful Laura Honey~


Alex smiled at her incredibly sweet Laura honey, which he loved oh so Very incredibly
much, and he kissed her nose and drained the water.  He grabbed one of the many oh so Very
soft and comfy towels and put it onto the floor and put a nice comfy soft pillow at the
top, and he grabbed Laura into his arms and placed her onto the towel, with her head on
the very soft and comfy pillow.  He got out another Very soft and comfy towel, and gently
dried off Laura’s feet, legs, sides of her bummie, all of her tummy, her arms, hands,
underarms, chest, neck, face, and hair.  He put his hand under the towel she is laying on,
went to between her legs, and dried where her pubic hairs are, and her genital area and
part of her bummie, and wrapped her with the towels and turned her so she was on top of
the other towel and on her belly, and dried off the rest of her bummie, all of her backie,
her neck, back of her head, and also more of the bottom of her legs.

~Dressing Up Laura ^-^~

	Alex turned her over again and pushed him up above her, then went down and put his arms
around her, and rubbed his nose against hers, and looked at her and smiled greatly, then
kissed her nose, then lips, and rubbed her tummy.  He went and grabbed their clothes as
Laura laid cozy and snug on the soft comfy towel with the other one on top of her.  Alex
went in and slowly slid off her top towel, and slid a new pair of panties on through her
feet and legs, and slid Simba Jammie bottoms on through her feet and legs.  And he went to
the other side of her where her head was and put his hands on her shoulders and she sat
up, and he put his arms around her with a new bra or whatever, that had Simba’s head all
over it, and put it on her; and she raised her arms and Alex slowly slid a new Jammie
shirt on, that had a big picie of a cute mew saying “Hug me Peas~” with a Blue Mew at the
bottom of the pink mew, with a paw hand thingy on her lower part of her belly and another
on the middle of her back.  Alex made these and many other clothes of hers on the
computer, Who-ha!

8 June 2008, 09:04 AM   #3
Guest Poster
Laura’s Silly, and Cute! ^-^


	Alex carried her in his arms and said “Wanna snuggle with me before Nappy-bye?” and Laura
shook her head up and down and said “Mm-hm!” Very cutely, Alex looked at her and laughed
quietly to himself, and closed his eyes happily..  She’s so Cute!!!  Alex put Laura into
the big comfy bed on her side into the blankets, turned on the lamp by the bed, and turned
off the main light, and then tucked Laura into the Blanket.  Then Laura grabbed one of the
comfy pillows Alex moved to her side earlier since it’s comfier than his, and tried
putting it on my side because she wanted me to be the most comfy.  Alex looked at her and
caught her in the act and said, “No Missy, you get the most comfy pillows!”  Then Laura
looked at him for a little..  And quickly put the pillow on his side and hid under the
covers!  Then Alex said “That’s it Missy!”  And he quickly climbed onto the bed and into
the covers, and started chasing Laura around in them, and Laura giggled a lot, and tried
to hide; but eventually Alex grabbed a hold of him.  Alex rubbed his nose against hers and
said; “Now you get the comfiest pillows, Okay Missy??”  And she said, “Uhm, I guess
soooo…” And Alex said “Good!” and kissed her.  Laura made happy noises, and kissed him
back; then Alex made happy noises and Laura giggled!

~Laura’s Cute Belly and Belly Button~


	Then Alex held onto Laura and crawled them like a worm out of the blankies, and Laura lay
on his chest cozily, and looked at him and quickly kissed his nosie and returned.  Alex
put his hands on the bottom part of her stomach and lifted her up to the side of him, and
Alex went down; Laura looked down at him cutely, and Alex started to push her shirt up
with his nose, and looked at Laura’s cute little belly button as it appeared, and he
looked at it and rubbed his cheek against it; and they started to roll so Alex was on top
of her and Laura was below him.  Laura put her left leg behind him, a little bellow his
bummie, and her right one right above the back of Alex’s knee, and Alex put his arms
around her and rubbed her back, and eventually slowly pushed the back of Laura’s shirt up
and rubbed her bare back.   Alex stopped rubbing his cheek against her cute belly where
her cute belly button was, and licked from right bellow her belly button to right above
her belly button.  His hands were at the upper part of her back, and Laura had her arms
around him rubbing his back, one in the middle part of his back, and another in the bottom
part of his back.


Licking Laura’s Sweet Belly ^^!


	Alex looked up to Laura, and he slowly started to take off her shirt, and Laura raised
her hands as he took her shirt off.  Alex knew he put a bra thingy onto her, but just now
realized she don’t usually wear one of those when in her Jammies, but bah, all well..  He
very gently put one of his hands on her belly and gently rubbed across everywhere that was
hidden under her shirt.  He put his hands on her arms and gently went up and down them, as
he started to kiss up the middle of her belly.  He lowered his head onto her belly more
and closed his eyes a little, and slid his tongue out of his mouth and onto her wonderful
belly, and gently started to lick it…  He licked every part of her belly, the middle and
sides and pushed her bra away a little bit to get more of her belly, and pushed her Jammie
bottoms and panties down a bit to lick more of her cute belly…


	He went up to where her bra was and closed his eyes a little and put a hand under her and
started to undo it, and put it where her Jammie shirt was, and closed his eyes and kissed
her right breast everywhere and licked it a little, and did the same with her left breast;
he licked until he got to the pink area around her left nipple, and then he put his right
hand on the bottom left side (on her point of view) of her breast, and slowly rubbed there
and underside of her breast.  He swirled his tongue around the outer edge of the pink
around her nipple and got closer to her nipple with each rotation, and he slowly slid her
nipple into his mouth and gently sucked it and kneaded it with his mouth, and pressed it
between his tongue and the roof of his mouth..  He slid it out of his mouth and blew cool
air on it for ten seconds, and then put his warm mouth on it and suckled on it, which is
all suppose to make her feel real good..  Once her nipple got swollen enough, he flicked
his tongue on the tip of nipple, back and forth, and eventually he’d go a little faster.. 
He did all of that to her other breast too..  He did all of that because it’s suppose to
make her feel very good physically only, not because he was perverted or aroused or
whatever!  He licked the entire top of her chest, and her neck and chin and cheek.  He
kissed her ear, and gently nibbled on her ear lobe, licked between her ear lobe and
collarbone, and licked below her ear, and up.  He licked her nose and put it inside his
mouth and licked it more..  He licked the side of her neck and up it.  And then he did all
of that to her other side.  He looked at her and all of her face looked moist, and she
looked very comfortable.  He licked any part that didn’t seem moist…


Licking inside her Mouth....


	Then he went to her lips, and licked around them, and licked her top and bottom lips;
then rolled a little so they were on their sides; then he put his arms around her again as
he gently slid his tongue slowly into her mouth…  He licked her tongue, all over, and he
loved it; he felt so warm, and her tongue was licking his, back…  He licked the top of her
mouth and the bottom, he licked the back of her teeth, the front part of her teeth, under
her teeth, her gums, and behind her lips..  And eventually he slid his tongue out…

The Back of Laura…

He gently slid Laura’s Jammie bottoms off, and her panties, and he started to rub all of
the back side of Laura..  They rolled over where Laura was on top of him, and he continued
rubbing all of the back of Laura a lot…  And he kissed the side of her neck and up to by
the bottom of her cheek a lot…  He started to slow down, and he put Laura down, on her
tummy.  He laid on top of her back with his arms around her, and he started kissing and
licking the back of Laura’s neck, and her check and jaw and all of her face again.  Then
he licked down all of her back, and licked on the side of it, as much as he could..  He
went down all of her back, and licked down the left side of Laura’s butt, and licked as
much as he could of her butt too.  The area around her er, anus, is suppose to feel really
good and have a lot of nerve endings around it, so he licked sort of around her anus too,
which is clean from the bath, only for it’s suppose to feel good to her…  He licked down
her leg and behind her knee, all over, as much as he could..  And went to her feet, and
put it to his mouth and kissed it and licked it and sucked her cute toes… 
He looked over the left side of Laura and made sure he got every single dot of her..  
He went to the top of the right side above Laura’s bummie and licked every part of her
right side behind her too…

I did this only for you to feel extremely good!!


	Then Alex turned Laura so she was lying on her back again.  He licked up the top of her
legs, her knees, above the genital area, and all of her belly and chest and neck again. 
And then he went down, and licked where her pubic hairs are; and he started going down, to
her, vagina…  Laura slowly opened her legs, and Alex gently pulled the lips of her vagina
back, and gently and slowly licked up it’s outer and inner lips, three times, on both
sides..  Then Alex closed them a little, and just licked up her whole vagina up and down,
and saw Laura’s belly going up and down as she breathes and she seemed to feel really
good, and he loved that he made her feel so good…  He pulled back the lips of her vagina
again, and licked all of her vagina in different ways..  Her vagina lips became swollen
and he sucked one into his mouth and licked it all over, and then did it to the other one,
and then he moved his tongue down her lips, to the opening of her vagina, and slid his
tongue in and moved it around near the entrance of it, where it’s supposed to feel good
most, and licked around inside of it, and eventually slowly slid his tongue in and out of
it, and went faster… 




He got his tongue out of her vagina’s opening eventually, and licked up to her clitoral
hood or whatever: the place where the clitoris is under, which the clitoris is the main
area of pleasure and is very sensitive and can be used to make her feel extremely good,
it’s a little bump hiding under the clitoral hood, and is sometimes hard to find…  He
licked down the top of her clitoral hood, and sucked on it, and it started to feel
extremely good to her; and then he pushed the hood back and her clitoris was there, and he
put it in his mouth and started sucking it, which made her feel Extremelyyyy good, like
ultima good; and sometimes he flicked his tongue on it quickly, and he slid two of his
left hand’s fingers into her vagina opening, in and out of her sort of fastly..  And as
she felt gooder, he increased the pace, until she got to an orgasm…  A lot of vaginal
fluids started to flow out of her vagina opening a lot, and into his mouth..  An orgasm is
where you reach your limit, and for most girls, their clitoris and stuff feel too
sensitive to be touched for a while once it happens; and Alex stopped…

The beautiful princess falls to sleep…

She lost a lot of energy and felt very tired.  Alex went up to her and they rolled over to
the side, and their noses touched.  He knew she was really tired, he kissed her nose, and
went up and put her against his chest, and she put her arms around him, and he put his
arms around her.  As Alex closed his eyes, he said in a whisper, “Laura honey..  I love
you so much….” And Laura closed her eyes against his chest too.  Alex kissed the top of
her head, and he reached for some massaging oils or whatever from the table next to them,
and as Laura tried to sleep, he put the oils and stuff all over the back of her, and
massaged her as she fall asleep, as much as he could with her on the side on his chest;
and continued as she was asleep…  Eventually he was done and he stroke her hair and rubbed
her back as she was asleep, and after those four hours of making her feel very good as she
was asleep, he went to sleep too, and felt way better than her, because he makes her feel
good and feel happy all the time and everything, and he thought of this and cried as he
closed his eyes with his arms around Laura..  Eventually he fell asleep, which he woke up
before her again the next day, and she woke up to him gently stroking her hair and him
softly kissing her head again…

The beautiful princess wakes up, to a whole new day


And so…  Laura, a sweet pure hearted girl, woke up; in Alex’s arms in their big very comfy
bed, naked still because Alex couldn’t of put her Jammies and Undies on her when she was
in the position she was in when asleep.  Her face was on his chest with his head on the
top of her head, and she heard the sound of light kisses, and felt her hair being gently
stroked too, she felt so good and comfy… She heard the quiet kissing noises for Alex was
kissing the top of her head a lot, softly; and he was gently stroking Laura’s beautiful
hair..  Alex smiled so much, because Laura smiled out of her comfyness and rubbed her head
against his chest a little, and put her arms around him more and squeezed tight!

~Getting Laura ready in the Morning~

	They sat up, Laura sat so the first part of her leg that goes up to her knee was up, and
then the other part of the leg with her feet was down on the bed.  Alex grabbed her Jammie
bottoms that he took off last night, and slipped them on her; and then Laura raised her
hands and he put her Jammie top on her.  He didn’t put any of her Undies on for, they were
going to put on regular clothes soon; he would just put new panties and a bra thingy on
her then.  He looked at her, then she looked at him; and he put his arms under her arms
and kissed her cheek several times.  He sat her up and got out her Brushie, and brushed
her hair for her.  Alex went and got her some cereal and a drink and sat next to her and
fed it.  Then he went and washed them, and he grabbed some of her clothes and sat back
next to her.

Picnic?  Ja!  ^-^  Dressing Laura Up ^-^


Alex sat behind her with her between his legs, and he put his arms around her and put his
head on her right shoulder and rubbed his cheek against hers, and said, “Want to go on a
Picnic, honey darling?” and kissed her cheek and rubbed his cheek against hers again.  She
said, “Okay!” and he said, “Okay honey” and he kissed the right side of her neck a little.
 He grabbed her Jammie shirt, and pulled it up a little, and she put her arms up as he
slid her shirt off; then Alex grabbed her Jammie bottom and slid them off her, she lifted
her butt when it had to slide off it, and then her foot when it got there.  Alex put his
arms around her and said “Oh, you’re whole beautiful body..  I think I’m going to faint
from seeing something so beautiful..” and he went and kissed her right cheek again.  He
got a bra with picies of Vulpix’s head all over it, and put it around her and put it on;
then he got a shirt with Rita on it with a paw to her mouth and she looked curious, and of
course cute, and Laura raised her arms and Alex slid the shirt on her.  Then he got
panties that were the light blue that Rita’s bow thingy is, in the background, with Rita
heads all over it; and he slid it on her.  Then he got comfy pants and slid them onto
	Alex carried Laura outside their house, and to the peaceful park.  He went across the
peaceful flower field, and then put Laura down, and put down a white and red thingy to be
on for the picnic, under a tree.  Alex scooped behind Laura honey, and put his arms around
her with her between his legs.  He got out a pickle and put it to her mouth and she opened
her mouth, and he put some of it in her mouth and she ate it and put the rest in, and did
this to some other pickles.  He fed her lemons too.  Then they laid down next to each
other, on their tummy, and with the back of their legs in the air, that connects with
their feet; and looked at the beautiful sun and setting and the most beautiful thing of
all: Laura!
	Then they looked at each other for a little, and they closed their eyes and kissed each
other’s lips; then looked at each other’s eyes again, and Alex kissed her nosie a little.

I never finished it past this point =P

8 June 2008, 11:07 PM   #4
Guest Poster
lol it is hilariously sweet :D 

16 June 2008, 03:51 PM   #5
Guest Poster
Last edited by Perfect_An, 11 July 2008
I can tell this is gonna get a LOT of comments...

17 June 2008, 02:47 PM   #6
Guest Poster
thats nice novelwriter

17 June 2008, 10:06 PM   #7
Guest Poster
Wow! Pretty good. ( i guess )

19 June 2008, 03:40 AM   #8
Joined: 26 Apr 2008
Posts: 42
K, I ahve an input, its really sweet but... Ina female point of view.... I would not want
ot be carried, and fed, I'd feel mentally ill, no offense to the.. er, mental. AND.... I
stopped reding after the bath ting, I do think itn is good... I also know that you were,
and maybe still are, SanjiAbu... That changed my whole perspective.... I tried to read it
as though  didn't know the writer at all. BUT... as you.... ugh, washed her bummie, it
kinda made me feel sick..

24 June 2008, 08:41 PM    #9
Joined: 31 May 2008
Posts: 23
okay, yeah. you're a pretty good writer. except the whole sucking her TOE and licking her
ARMPIT. parts. i stopped after that. *shrug* maybe when i'm not hungry i'll finish reading
it. and meep's right, too. what's with the whole babying her thing? she sounds either dead
or mentally retarded and unable to function opn her own (which i also pose no offense
alright, i got bored and read the "good" part. kay, uhm...yeah. it feels like i'm watching
a porna with my teacher explaining the details. when writing such graphic stuff, i
suggesting just not explaining all that. we have dictionaries, the internet, and other
friends to find out what a "clitoral hood" is. and i might as well point out that licking
another person's anus sounds kinda, you know HORRIBLY DISGUSTING. it's an EXIT, not


that's all for now.
just puttin my opinion (and possibly others') out there.
it's constructive critisism, meaning it will teach you that some will like it, others
simply won't.

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