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Writing:Poetry:Shadows


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17 March 2010, 04:01 PM   #1
Joined: 29 Jun 2009
Posts: 28
Last edited by ‹NeverThoughtLoveAndLossFeltSoMuchAlike›, 18 March 2010
Should I cry?
In this absense of light
It frightens me
And I am so sorry
So apologetic
But I don't cry

I creep
And the shadows follow me
Should I weep?
Will it keep them away?
Can I do one thing, anything
To keep them at bay?
Sobbing won't help
So turn the other way
I won't cry

People lose their faces
Lose their lives and their light
They cast shadows and I fear them
Cast dark stranger and I tear then
But I won't cry
All alone, what would it do
But drawn their attention?

The dark faces look away
Hiding in their lies
I'm alive, I'm alive
I swear it
But they don't know how to believe
They lost the will to cry
I need a hope
I need a light
Something to look to
In the arctic night
Where beauty abounds
In everything
There, my friends, is what I need

18 March 2010, 01:07 AM   #2
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Joined: 11 Mar 2009
Posts: 212
Last edited by Oroborus21, 18 March 2010
i liked this poem. what do the "dark shadows" represent? fears, depression, doubts?

one minor grammatical thing: you mean "lose" not "loose"

as in something that is lost not something that is not tight

i liked the ending which seemed hopeful

18 March 2010, 01:47 AM   #3
Joined: 29 Jun 2009
Posts: 28
--you mean "lose" not "loose"
Thx. I'll fix it.

& they kinda represent all of those. They represent all those things that you rather not
think about but find yourself contemplating all the same. If that makes sense.
I need a hope
I need a light
Something to look to
In the arctic night
Where beauty abounds
In everything
There, my friends, is what I need

19 March 2010, 10:53 PM   #4
Guest Poster
What is with all the morid poetry?

23 March 2010, 12:27 AM    #5
Joined: 22 Mar 2010
Posts: 5
Nice it really communicated a form of sad emotions, I like when poems can communicate
something interesting.



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