grr, more writing that won't leave my mind... <3 Login to Kupika  or  Create a new account 
 

This diary entry is written by ‹Stellar_Sells!<3 =D›. ( View all entries )
 
Previous entry: A bit morbid, but I couldn't get it out of my mind... in category (general)
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grr, more writing that won't leave my mind... <3Category: (general)
Friday, 13 May 2011
12:17:41 AM (GMT)
It fills my lungs with air, get's the blood rushing through my veins with a fiery
heat, It burns just below the surface, smoldering, trying to claw it's way through my
lips, makes me want to take on the world, makes me forget my insecurities. When I
hold it back, it's like denying my heart, and ripping my soul from my body, and being
an empty shell.... It's meant to be, I fear if I keep denying it, I won't
survive...<3


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Why do I want to talk to you so bad, when I have nothing to say...I want you to see
me, but I don't want you to look at me, for fear of not being good enough. I want you
to touch me some more, not sexually, but, Idk, the affection, comfort, I guess...It
drives me crazy, I hang on your words, and I can't stop thinking of you, I've never
wanted anyone to touch me so badly(still not sexually >_<")...I sure as hell hope you
feel the same, I kinda think so, but not sure, and scared to find out...I'm not sure
if I'm ready for this, but I can't help wanting to hold your hand,have you play with
my hair...ugh! I hate,hate,hate itt! I hope it's not just physically, your funny,
cute, ugh! still hatee it...the whole time talking with another guy, (him
being"romantic"), I think of you, think of how I wish it was you... why did you do
this to me? When you were with her, I wanted you...I can't look you in the eyes, I
can barely look at you, I'm scared you'll see, I don't want to lose your friendship
if anything...I like it when you get close,even if I instinctively step away, maybe
even tense when you just casually touch me....but I wish I could go back, and not
step away, or tense...even if it scares the hell out of me...I wish this was easier,
I wish I could just get it out there, without feeling awkward...-sigh- I guess I have
nothing else to get out.....
Last edited: 14 May 2011

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