Monday, 7 September 2009
12:17:04 AM (GMT)
I could have been catching up with the only girl in the family who's remotely my age
and I haven't seen in a year... inf act, aside from like twenty minutes last summer,
I haven't seen her in four or five years. I could have been asking my super-smart
cousin if he's excited to go to Shanghai on this Universtiy scholarship-trip thing.
I could have been babysitting some kids. But no, not me! These are the things that
I discovered at today's family reunion.
1. It is creepy when your 42-year-old cousin (Don't freak out, there's 14 aunts
and uncles that span 25 years, okay? And she's awesome and seems a lot younger than
she really is. ) tells you how your 22-year-old(?) cousin got hot and now looks
like Taylor Lautner. CREEPY.
2. It is even creepier to realize that, oh shit, she's right!!!?!?!?! *shoots
3. It is expanentially beyond creepy to start assessing how the gene pool has
mutated throughout the generations. Now, my mom and aunts and uncles aren't exactly
"ugly" persay, but they're not stunning. They're average, alright, fairly
good-looking... they're just okay. In fact, Iwouldn't call any of them pretty or
handsome except one, and even that's pushing it. However, the next generation is
significantly better looking. Like I've already said, the 42-year-old cousin and the
22-year-old cousin are amazingly good-looking, as are 42-year-old's tow sisters. I
don't know if I've got all that much facial beauty, but I adore my eyes and
hands/fingers, and, if I do say so myself, my legs are pretty amazing. My
cousin Michelle (the one I haven't seen in four or five years) is platinum blonde
with blue eyes and really, super-fair skin... she's absolutely stunning. And, of
course, this is not even touching the generation after mine... seven little girls,
all absolute dolls. They are gorgeous!... Plus eight-and-a-half-year-old Aiden from
Alberta, who is young yet but will porbably look like Prince Harry when he grows up,
My point is that I've noticed that, as the years have gone by, my mom's side of
the family has gotten so much better looking. Now, what kind of 14-year-old can
gauge this sort of thing with ages spanning from 2 to 82?... What kind of
fourteen-year-old would even want to? EXPANENTIALLY BEYOND CREEPY!
*Sees Patrick* *Shoots herself*
Last edited: 7 September 2009