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This diary entry is written by myfunsocks. ( View all entries )

Life sucks.Category: Life. is. shit.
Sunday, 7 June 2009
09:32:58 PM (GMT)
Why the fuck , must i hide who i am in front of everyone in my family. There is only one person i can truly be myself around. But even she tattles on me telling everyone i say obscenities when i'm mad. I can't trust anyone. WHAT THE HELL. It's funny how , you're family is suppose to be the one's who you can trust. But no , my family likes to talk about people behind they're backs. I do this too , but at least i have the guts to own up to it. It seems my life isn't good enough for any of them. My grandmother wants me to be some barbie , who wears mini skirts and dresses when she goes anywhere. Well i know one thing , i'm far from being a barbie. What bugs the shit out of me though is that i have nobody to be myself around. Be my , obscenity screaming , pants wearing , converse loving , tomboy , artistic self around. And i hate it. I just hate it. The worst thing is that I've considered suicide many times before. Many. I just can't escape my wretched life. I guess the only place i can do whatever it is i want , is online. The Internet is somewhere i can be judged but i don't hate them for judging me. Because they're not my family. I don't "know" them. I love the Internet. I'm practically a nerd. No i am a nerd. I'm not ashamed of being a nerd either. Why should i be? Really , who doesn't want to be just a bit different from everyone else? Nobody. Most girls want to fit in , i don't. I just want to find that BFF , find that one true love, and go on with my life. But i guess that will never happen for me. Or it would have already happened. Now , most people have to wait awhile to find someone they can love. I am prepared for that. But the BFF should be here already. LIKE NOW PLEASE. Ughh. But i don't need you're pity. I am swimming in happiness. My price sticker wearing , tomboy , converse wearing , music loving , happiness. It's just fantastical. So i'm going to stop ranting about my shitty life now. Goooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooodbye.

masaki115 says :   3 March 2011   638509  
dont give up, everything gets better  if you ever just want
someoneto talk to message me, ok? 

you dont need to fit in, yyou dont need to look like a barbie, nerds
run this world, and if you get hurt trying to smell the roses your
smelling the wrong bit 

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