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Why Edward is a Bad BoyfriendCategory: (general)
Monday, 18 August 2008
03:32:07 AM (GMT)
I did not make this.

   Summary of Points


   Edward is jealous of Jacob, to the tune of actively preventing her from having a
relationship with him. Abuse red flag number one.
   Edward isolates Bella from her friends, then abandons her. At that time, he tells
her "you aren't good enough," in blatant disregard for how this is going to hurt
her.
   In abandoning her, he forbids her best friend - Alice - from seeing her.
   "I couldn't live without you." : Edward attempts suicide over Bella, telling her
beforehand that he's planning on doing so. Control tactic.
   Edward encourages Bella to lie to her father about seeing him, and furthermore
sneaks around Charlie's back in order to see Bella after curfew and before Charlie
knew about the relationship.
   Edward frightens Bella unnecessarily with his vampirism but does not take steps to
ensure her safety.
   Edward does not allow Bella to make her own decisions or to disagree with him.
   In the beginning of New Moon, Edward hides, takes, or destroys all her possessions
that are associated with him. 
   Edward takes Bella's belongings that are associated with him in an effort to
control her healing process. But Bella is in charge of how she deals with the loss.
   Edward watches Bella while she sleeps. Even before Bella is aware that he is doing
so. A violation of privacy.


Common Arguments


   Edward didn't mean to hurt her.
But he did hurt her. We can't rationalize abuse, even if it is not consciously
intentional.
   Edward is jealous of Jacob because he's a dangerous werewolf - remember
Emily.
And remember that unnamed 'singer' girl that Emmet killed. Jacob is dangerous. Edward
is also dangerous. Double standards are not cool.
   Edward doesn't encourage her to lie to Charlie - he asks her to tell Charlie
that they're seeing each other.
He asks he to tell Charlie so he'll have "some small incentive" not to kill her -
that is, so he'll get in trouble if he hurts her. Since Bella has shown a strong
disregard for her own safety, this isn't a compelling argument. Further, his actions
in sneaking around Charlie's back both before and after curfew was instated
demonstrate a real disregard for any sense of openness between Bella and her father.
   Edward scares Bella to make her understand the danger.
No matter what the reason, it isn't right to try and frighten your girlfriend. She
knows he's dangerous and can decide to take that risk for herself.
   Edward tries to act in Bella's own interests.
Which he attempts by taking away Bella's independence and free will. Not a good
deal.
   Edward's attempted suicide proves he loves her - it's not a control
tactic.
Killing yourself over someone does not prove you love them, it proves that you need
mental help. 
   Edward committed suicide because he thought Bella was dead. It can't have been
an attempt to control her.
But he told her that he was going to commit suicide beforeheand - and that makes it a
suicide threat, which is characteristic of abusers. Some of them are unstable enough
to go through with it. Plus, even if his suicide is contingent on her death rather
than her absence, it's still imposing on her decisions by making her re-evaluate the
daily risks that she's willing to take.
   Edward is a vampire. You can't apply human psychology to him.
Why not? He was born human and has lived in human society for the past hundred years.
Yes, as a vampire he's going to have a different perspective on some things, but the
psychology is essentially the same.
   Edward is only human. He makes mistakes.
And, like a human, is responsible for his actions. Making mistakes is understandable
- repeating them heedless to others is abuse.
   Why do you care so much anyway?
Because it's indicitive of a pattern in society to idealize unhealthy and abusive
relationships.
   You suck.
This is a vampire book. I thought sucking was a good thing.
Last edited: 18 August 2008

Comments 
iAmAFatVegan says:   25 November 2008   915379  
"Edward is only human. He makes mistakes." Actually, isn't Edward a
vampire?
"I thought sucking was a good thing." lol, you don't know how I
translated that.
 
explorer_of_darkness says:   25 November 2008   636287  
Yeah, I know how you translated it. XD
 
tiggerlemon101 says:   20 July 2009   592157  
Exactly.

Egg-zactly.

 
ButserofChainLetters says:   20 July 2009   434133  
Good points! XD

I wouldn't want to be with someone like Edward..... O_O
 
Breakthrough says :   25 June 2010   395185  
Edward is only human.
That was a common argument? But Edward's not even human. He's the sugar plum fairy I don't get how that could have been in the common arguments section. Not that he gets much extra powers with his sparkly vampireness anyway, other than the ability to stalk people in a much more secretive way.
 

 
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