Thursday, 5 July 2007
09:35:09 PM (GMT)
I couldn't believe he was still saying those words, even here, even now.
This was suppose to be the moment, our final argument,
where we swear we never want to see each other again.
And life would move on, the pain will stop forever for both of us.
At least that's what's suppose to happen, it's what has always happened before. With
But here you are, crying so hard and holding on to me fiercely as if something were
trying to pull you from my body.
Why are you fighting so hard to stay at my side?
I've done everything in my power to knock you away.
No matter how many times I step on you, you keep crawling back.
I look into your glittering brown eyes so coldly.
Trying to figure out why you just won't leave me.
Then, despite myself, I lean down and gently kiss the tears from your eyes, and wrap
my arms around you in defeat.
I know why you'll never leave me, despite my words, despite my actions.
I can't mask it, I can't hide it.
You know I've fallen in love with you.
You know that sooner or later we'll work it out.
You'll keep fighting for it.
You believe it and sometimes I want to believe too.
I hold you as you cry desperately into my chest and I pet your hair
gently, calming you down.
And when you look up from my chest you see the tears I'm desperately
trying to hold back.
This growing love, It scares me that it might be eternal.
Never have I known such love.
I try to whisper my apologies but my chest tightens and I strain to hold
the pain from my voice as another flow to tears threaten to fall.
I try to let go and just love you, it would seem so easy right?
You've proven your love to me countless times.
Then why, why is it so hard to love you back?
I finally fail as an tear escapes and runs a swift pace only
to break on my lips.
I'm done yelling and I'm done trying to pushing away again.
Now I just want to hold you.
I hold you tighter as more tears fall..
I hush you gently, bringing my hand to your chin and tilting
your head up before leaning down and placing a kiss on your lips.
Instantly your cheeks flush pink and a warmth grows between us.
How many times have we stood here like this?
I want to believe it'll last this time..
Just like I want to believe every time..
What do we have to do to finally be free of this
constant loop of events that continues to hurt us both?
As our lips part your body's shaking so badly, standing solid,
eyes filled with fire.
You hate yelling at me I know it cause you shake so much afterwards.
I can't answer any questions when it comes to us.
I've never had to handle this before which leads me
back to the most persistent question of them all;
Despite your love for me, why do you stay?
Despite my hateful words, why do I stay?
My arms is still softly around your back while you
leaning into the embrace.
I'll trying to figure everything out so you won't
have to be hurt anymore.
I want to see us happy too but it seems as if
everything in the world is against us.
As the lights of dawn begin to flush the sky,
I'll finally have worked these thoughts to exhaustion
and I'll lay my head against yours, and sigh softly.
As I drift off, the softest of whispers will come to me
as I borderline sleep.
Suddenly, there is no hate, or angst, or masks
between my heart and my thoughts.
And somewhere in those whispers, the answers will come..
We'll continue to fight and soon we'll work it out..