Tuesday, 3 May 2011
05:41:47 PM (GMT)
"They took the bins out today".
Right, let's get down to business, because I have many a theory on this whole
conspiracy at the moment.
Unless you've been living under a rock
or in Scotland, then you'll probably
know that Osama bin Laden was supposedly "murdered" yesterday morning, 2nd May 2011,
but a secret USA FBI operation in Pakistan.
Now, I'm not denying that they got him, because they indeed did, but I have a few
observations that I shall now make on the subject. Seeing as it's obviously a very
sensitive subject for many people, I'd love to hear your views and opinions about
this whole situation. And your bad jokes about it too... see mine. XD
He's not dead. I am 75% sure that he isn't. And here is why.
1. The FBI lied. The operation did not happen this weekend at all. I am 100% certain
about that - the actual operatin in Pakistan happened last week in fact, probably
Tuesday or Wednesday. This is backed up by the fact that the English Royal Family
obviously knew about it before Will and Kate's wedding on Friday - they cancelled
their honeymoon to Jordan last week, probably with the knowledge of what the FBI had
done, though the information had not been disclosed then. It would be too risky to
have the heir to the English throne out in the wide world with such political unrest.
The honeymoon was cancelled last week.
2. Everything that followed happened far too quickly to not raise suspicion. And my
father, who is a high ranking miltary officer and who has served in the Middle East
mutliple times, agrees that it is very unlike usual miltaristic movements. They
executed Osama, preformed his autopsy, took "DNA reports" and dumped his body in the
sea in less than a day? Unlikely. It is probable that they either wanted to dup the
body before anybody could preform a second autopsy to confirm it's identity
(think Princess Diana's death... similar circumstances... also MJ), or even if their
was a body to begin with. Those photos in the papers have been proven as fake, before
you say. It's not Osama - it is actually a photo from April 2009.
3. It is highly likely that the American government have seized Osama and are keeping
him locked away in a high security prison (bets are on Nevada currently), but they
can't announce to the world that they are keeping him. Think about it. If al-Qaeda
discovered this, they'd be all over America trying to find him. By announcing his
death, the Americans have gained themselves more time to prepare for the onslaught of
terror, but also they've gained a propaganda advantage of sorts, a victory over the
Taliban and what not. It's a morale boost for the American and Western publics,
thinking we killed the bitch in cold blood. And let's think about it some more...
Osama has no use to any one dead... at all. Yes, it's revenge, sweet revenge
for all those lives lost - both American, Afghani and worldwide, but there is
absolutely no other gain for the FBI in killing him. They'll want him alive, they'll
want as much information out of him as possible - they wouldn't just let a major lead
into al-Qaeda and the Taliban die just like that. They'll be torturing him somewhere,
4. This might just be a bad joke on the FBI's part, but... Osama bin Laden, announced
dead on 2nd May 2011.
Adolf Hitler, announced dead on 2nd May 1945.
Bad joke or cruel coincidence? You can be the judge of that one, but I find it very
"It's been a real Disney weekend - the Prince got married and the bad guy got
Anyway, there's my reasoning for believing that the bitch is not in fact dead...
perhaps take it into consideration and do your own digging. Or maybe I just love my
conspiracy theories too much.
The terror threat will be on an all time high over the next few years - even though I
doubt we'll see anything from al-Qaeda for about two months or so... I fear for my
country especially - our 2012 Olympics and the Queen's Diamond Jubilee appear to be
the prime targets for terrorist activity in the near future, as well as the tenth
anniversary of 9/11 later this year... though that's more unlikely (terrorists don't
seem to be the bitchy kind). Nevertheless, it's all coming out of our pockets. I just
wish the government would up their own game with security checks, particularly in
airports. Not to sound rascist, but most bloody terrorists are middle eatsern blokes
with turbans and beards, so why waste so much time checking grannies and five year
old kids, when you might be watsing the time you would spend thoroughly checking
someone who fits a bomber profile?
Whatever the case, the FBI got their man, there is no doubt about that (and I've been
bumming around the FBI website for days). Obama said he'd get him within his four
years in office, and he did. This is certainly a victory for him in that respect.
Also, Pakistan is a real bitch: "lol we dont have him lol". Yeah, right. Ot only
turns out we was within miles of your equivilant of Sandhurst, eh? Suspisious. But
you have nukes, so we wont say anything offical about it.
But I think that whether or not this man is dead is of little importance in the long
run - first, we should be thinking about all those who have suffered at the hands of
Bin Laden and his extremists. Those who lost their lives in 9/11, and all those
effected by that, the bombings across the rest of the world (notably the potentially
linked London bombings of 2005), and perhaps, more close to my own heart, our service
men and women who are defending our nations from worse people.
My dad fought for our country, and I'm incredibly proud of him. I've seen what that
can do to a person, so I hope that we have now taken a giant leap forward in the war
on terrorism, and that people won't have to suffer for much longer.
Maybe our generation will be the ones who turn it all around...
...or perhaps North Korea will just nuke us all. Yeah, that's more likely.
"Elton John wrote a new song to commemorate this day: 'Sandles in the bin'."
EDIT: If anyone says that he was given "a proper burial as Isalm requires",
I'll ask you to question since when did the FBI actually give a shit about any of
that? They're not paid to be nice people, they basically control the whole fucking
world. The FBI are more powerful than any monarchy, prime minister or president
anywhere... only MI5/6 comes close, and that's still a long way off.
EDIT 2: Might I stress again that all of this is merely opinion and theory, just
supported by evidence I have collected. Make up your ow minds for sure, but please
don't take it out on me. We are all entitled to our own opinions and beliefs, but not
the right to force them on everyone else.
EDIT 3: Yum. http://uk.news.yahoo.com/osama-bin-laden-conspiracy-theories.html
Last edited: 4 May 2011
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