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This diary entry is written by atozhiye. ( View all entries )
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cause i deleted my tumblr.Category: (general)
Wednesday, 8 February 2012
09:07:22 PM (GMT)
You know, the body deals with pain in ways which we do not understand. Any pain
caused upon our bodies can be easily countered with a wound that inflicts even more
pain than our previous wounds. For example, if we were to hit our toe against a door,
then we'd be in a lot of pain, but if we were to take a hammer and hit ourselves
numerous times on the hand right after, then the pain in our toes would go away
because the pain in our hands is much worse, so the brain chooses to ignore all
primary pain and focus on the worse inflicted injuries. Go ahead, try it. This
concept goes the same for emotional pain. Maybe i thought that me leaving you would
put me in pain, but none of that mattered anymore the second he left you. The
importance of me compared to him became pitiful, so the moment he left you, I ceased
to exist. The tiniest thought of you even possibly missing me vanished. All your
thoughts and your whole mind only contained him. There are some people who I will
always leave, but give me enough time and I would always comes back, but I guess
there is a time where you know deep inside that's it's really over, no matters how
much you want to go back again. So, you're stuck with the habit of always wanting to
go back, but you can't go back, because we have no idea how to deal with it. I am
lost because you're always there. I am strong enough to push people away only if
there is distance, but there is no distance between me and you because you're always
around no matter how hard i try to block you out. I held on through everything
because even though I knew there was no chance of us ever being friends again, part
of me hoped that you missed me as much as i missed you. I hoped that you haven't
forgotten me, but all hope is lost now. The pain I caused you does not exist anymore
because the pain he caused you is more significant than anything and everything I
ever meant to you. The way you talk about him, and the way you write about him, you
don't know, but I'm noticing. The songs that we had together will always remind me of
you while those songs will now always remind you of him, and just like everyone else,
you have moved on to bigger and better things. I am sad, but I am happy for you. You
have become stronger than me and I know that from the scars you've left on me in
which I'll never forget.

Manderlinaa says :   27 February 2012   522929  
write a novel please


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