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This diary entry is written by Georbiejoy. ( View all entries )

an ordinary dayCategory: (general)
Tuesday, 16 January 2007
11:20:46 AM (GMT)
so here i am... just sitting all alone... there are times that i hope i can be on my
own little schedule... where i can study when i want, pause time for a little bit
when i want, sleep when i want, walk out of my class when i want... i know i sound
silly and selfish... but i cant help it... some say that i am probably bipolar...
like i am on the edge of my insanity and then come back to real life... there are
times like i am on top of the world, but there are also times where i am pretty
suicidal... like i see no sense in living this life anymore. i need to exercise my
patience... and i need to be more honest with my self as much as i need to be honest
with a lot of people too... first if all, i must learn to get to know myself, and
know what i really want and what i dont want... just be myself and not even try to
impress other people just so they would learn to like or even love me. i have a real
big issue on that. and then, once i do get to have them, they dont work, because as
the relationship progresses, they come to find out that the girl that they first met
is totally not me...  i am also having a hard time to forgive myself... there's just
too much mistake that i am still regretting over.. sooo bad as a Christian, but as
ive said. i can t even help it...

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