Chapter 1 My Story (No Name yet) Constructive Criticism Please Login to Kupika  or  Create a new account 

This diary entry is written by ‹Beth;ICan;Make;You;Believe;In;Love&&;Sex&&;Magic›. ( View all entries )
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Chapter 1 My Story (No Name yet) Constructive Criticism PleaseCategory: READ THIS!
Friday, 20 March 2009
06:56:50 PM (GMT)
I will not post the whole thing on here I just want to know if this chapter
sounds alright (:

Cars, speeding down the motorway, Eliza closed her eyes. Her last breath...

It was warm, " Wow if this is Heaven I'm glad I died," Eliza thought to herself. She
didn't dare open her eyes just in case...
She took a deep breath in. "Eurgh all I smell is wet dog!" She thought again. She
tried sitting up "OWCH!" Eliza couldn't move her arms were numb & cold. And she could
feel a tight rope round her legs. She could feel that her clothes were sopping wet.
She opened her eyes. It looked like the interior of a car. It WAS the interior of a
car. A very posh one too. There was a board in front of her. Eliza supposed that on
the other side was where the driver sat.
"So you've finally awakened then," Said a male voice Eliza didn't recognise.It was
the kind of voice you'd expect an angel would have although his was full of power.
"Y..Yes sir" Eliza replied whilst shaking and only quater of the reason why was being
cold. The man laughed. Eliza noted it was a true laugh. One that most people couldn't
help smiling to. But she knew better. 
"Don't call me sir makes me sound old."
Eliza stil laid down was puzzled. There were a hundred questions she wanted to ask.
But she settled for the easiest & most important one.
"Are you God?"
The man Chuckled.

WillxYouxStayxAwakexForxMe says:   20 March 2009   915377  
i want to read more lol.. you should post more.. it sounds good.
‹Beth;ICan;Make;You;Believe;In;Love&&;Sex&&;Magic› says:   20 March 2009   132956  
It's Not meant to be a story for free :P
I want to finish it & get it published for real (:
I'm proud of the plot & stuff
WillxYouxStayxAwakexForxMe says :   24 March 2009   391293  
well.. i hope everything works out 4 u =]


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