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This diary entry is written by ‹* ☻ Who Wants Cookies? ☺*›. ( View all entries )
 
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My Retarded Chain letter RantCategory: (general)
Sunday, 8 November 2009
01:34:38 AM (GMT)
Yola my peoples. I am going to reant to ya about Fugging chain letters. Yeah its
been done, but i dont care so heres mine. 

I am already super busy, sick, tons of stuff to do and i am trtying to ear 6,500
dollars for the people to people program, so please please excuse me if i dont need
EVERYONE sending me dumbass chain letters about stupid crap like YOUR GONNA DIE or HE
WILL LOVE YOU FOREVER.

Maybe the evil chain letter ghosts will come into my room and stranle me in my sleep
for not continuing the chain which was started by some idiot who was bored like 5
billion  years ago and was brought to this country by  pilgrims on the Mayflower and
if it makes it to the year 2000, it'll be in the Guinness Book of World Records for
longest continuous streak of scaring people and feeding them stupid ideas. Fug them.


If you're going to forward something, at least send me something mildly amusing. I've
seen all the "send this to 50 of your closest friends, and this poor, wretched excuse
for a human being will somehow receive a nickel from some omniscient being" forwards
about 90 times. I don't fugging care.If its a lie about some poor kid who you are
helping, FUG OFF! I know its a lie. Show a little intelligence and think about what
you're actually contributing to by sending out forwards.  Chances are it's your own
unpopularity. 

THE FOUR BASIC TYPES OF CHAIN LETTERS:
>Chain Letter Type 1: 
>> (scroll down) 
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>> Make a wish!!!
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>> No, really, go on and make one!!!
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>>You know you want to.....
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>> Oh please, they'll never go out with you!!!
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>> Wish something else!!!
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>> Not that, you pervert!!
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>> Is your finger getting tired yet?
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>>STOP!!!! 
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>>

Wasn't that fun? 

Hope you made a great wish 

Now, to make you feel guilty, here's what I'll do. First of all, if you don't send
this to 5 trillion  people in the next 5 seconds, you will be thrown into a well by a
scary dead girl with no hands. It's true! Because, THIS letter isn't like all of
those fake ones, THIS one is TRUE!! Really!!! Here's how it goes:

*Send this to 1 person: One person will hate you for sending them a stupid chain
letter. 

*Send this to 2-5 people: 2-5 people will hate you for sending them a stupid chain
letter. 

*Send this to 5-10 people: 5-10 people will behate  you for sending them a stupid
chain letter, and may try and ruin your life.

*Send this to 10-20 people: 10-20 people will hate you for sending them a stupid
chain letter and will crash your house and throw you down a well, and then party at
your house.

Thanks!!!! Good Luck!!! 

-------------------------------------------------------

Chain Letter Type 2 

Hello, and thank you for reading this letter. You see, there is a starving little boy
in Baklaliviatatlagloosheturkeyhungarynewguineapigen who has no arms, no legs, no
parents, and no goats. This little boy's life could be saved, because for every time
you pass this on, a dollar will be donated to the Little Starving Legless Armless
Goatless Boy from Baklaliviatatlagloosheturkeyhungarynewguienpigen Fund. Oh, and
remember, we have absolutely no way of counting the emails sent and this is all a
complete load of crap. So go on, reach out. Send this to 5 people in the next 47
seconds. Oh, and a reminder - if you accidentally send this to 4 or 6 people, you
will die instantly and this fictious little boy will be your murder.

Thanks again!! 

------------------------------------------------------- 

Chain Letter Type 3 

Hi there!! This chain letter has been in existence since 1658. This is absolutely
incredible because there was no email then and probably not as many sad dumbass
bitches with nothing better to do. So this is how it works: Pass this on to 15,067
people in the next 7 minutes or something horrible will happen to you like: 

*Bizarre Horror Story #1 

Bella swan was walking home from school on Saturday. She had recently received this
letter and ignored it because she was dreaming about Jacob Black. She then tripped in
a crack in the sidewalk, fell into an awesomly hot Edward Cullen, was turned into a
vampire, and has sex with him every day and night. Not only did she smell nasty to
Jacob black, she was dead to him. This Could Happen To You!!! 

*Bizarre Horror Story #2 

Mike Newton, a super annoying guy from Forks washington, got a chain letter in his
mail and ignored it. Later that day, he was hit by a car and so was his boyfriend,
none other than Jacob Black (Sorry team jacob. If you like petaphiles who fall in
love and dream of doing it with their best friend and her daughter than thats on you.
But hey, some people swing that way). They both died and went to hell and were cursed
to watch Bella and Edward live happily ever after. This Could Happen To You Too!!! 

Remember, you could end up just like Bella, Edward, Jacob, and Mike. But not Alice,
cause frankly she is just awesome. Just send this letter to all of your loser
friends, and everything will be okay.

------------------------------------------------------- 

Chain Letter Type 4:

As if you care, here is a poem that I found on the internet that everyone knows
because it is complet bullpoopie and is such a cliche, but i will pretend i wrot it..
Send it to every one of your friends.

~*Friends*~ 

A friend is someone who is always at your side, 
A friend is someone who likes you even though you stink of shit, and your breath
smells like you've been eating catfood, 
A friend is someone who likes you even though you're as ugly as a hat full of
assholes, 
A friend is someone who cleans up for you after you've soiled yourself, 
A friend is someone who stays with you all night while you cry about your sad,
pathetic little sad life, 
A friend is someone who scrubs your toilet, vacuums and then gets the check and
leaves and doesn't speak much English... -no, sorry that's my maid because i am a
selfish lazy asshole who thinks forieners should only be used for cleaning up my
messes, and blamed for the economy.
A friend is not someone who sends you chain letters because he wants his wish of
being rich to come true.

Now pass this on! If you don't, you'll never have sex or be lovable ever again.

----------------------------------------------------------- 

The point of my retarded rant being? 

If you get some chain letter that's threatening to leave you shagless or luckless for
the rest of your life, delete it. If it's funny, send it on. 

Don't piss people off by making them feel guilty about a leper in
Whatthefuckwhogivesashit  land with no teeth, who's been dead for 27 years, whose
only money his still grieving family will get  is the 5 cents per letter he'll
receive if you forward this mail, otherwise you'll end up like Bella,Edward,Jacob, or
even Mike. Right?

Also, Dont send me that crap and we will get along Fine.

This prooves most people will read anything to learn about my boring sad pethetic
existince, but hey its your time waste it all ya want.

Comments 
‹(^0^)otoko;otoko_♫› says:   8 November 2009   938400  
Long name dude. ^__^
 
‹* ☻ Who Wants Cookies? ☺*› says :   8 November 2009   370119  
yup, and why do you hate america?
 
 
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