+Things that really shouldn't be in a novel, but will get put in one
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+Things that really shouldn't be in a novel, but will get put in one
Category: Ideas
Saturday, 20 September 2008
02:39:58 PM (GMT)
So, it's nearly November. At least, it seems it. So I'm getting a headstart on
planning my NaNoWriMo for this year. I have a useful little writing programme called
Writer's Blocks which I've been using to house the stuff for it. I'm thinking of
starting one in September also, as a humour novel, so I can save my serious vampire
novel for the actual month.
The main point of this humour novel is to put in everything ridiculous I can think
of. This came to me while reading last year's NaNoWriMo dares thread, so most of the
stuff here will be stupid. I'm so tempted to use this gem;
 Have the characters take over the story
>BP if you can't take it back
>>DBP if they change the plot drastically
>>>TBP if your main characters become villians
>>>>QBP if you kick them out and redo the whole story with a different cast of
>>>>>x5 BP if you call that chapter "And now for something completely different"
>>>>>>x6 BP if the new characters are terrible at their job
>>>>>>>x7 BP and a cake if the original cast of characters stand on the sidelines
making rude comments
>>>>>>>>x8 BP and a pie if this makes then new characters do even worse.
But I'm not sure if I could fit this all in.

Here's a list of things I will include - 

+Talking to myself all through the novel. 
+A character who is not the other character's species falling in love with other
character. Bonus points to myself if I can somehow make it an inanimate object i.e a
+Epic fight scene with poeple of main character's imagination. Bonus points to myself
if those characters win. A reward of a cookie if somehow it leaves scars on the Main
Character and people notice. Infinity if the character actually admits to it and the
poeple who asked believe him. 
+Talking inanimate object as a main character who is somehow crucial to the plot.
Double points if I can give it a really obvious name that nobody ever comments on.
i.e an umbrella named Brolly.
+Have a character who speaks in a bizarre “dialect” that’s actually the result
of putting whatever they’re saying through various different languages in Babelfish
and then back to English.
+A random song and dance sequence at an inappropriate time. 
+Characters repeatedly breaking the fourth wall. And occasionally yelling at the
+A character who asks the MC's stance on the liberation of spoon at the end. Double
points if it is the last line in the novel.
+Minor character who's a vampire, but also a retired ballet dancer. Double bonus
points if he offers the main character ballet lessons for free.
+Weather forecasters. The TV will randomly turn itself on and on to a weather
channel, as the weatherman constantly makes insane predictions. Bonus points if none
of them happen and right at the end they all happen at once.
+Have a character who consults their Magic 8 Ball before answering any questions.
Even one's like 'What is your name?' Bonus points if it's a Magic 8 Ball they made
themself and he has different ones for certain types of questions.
+A game of twenty questions in the middle of a big battle scene.
+"If we don't find this hamster some proper mittens soon we're going to be in real
+Somebody must mention bunnies in every scene. No real reason for this, it just is.
Bonus points if it's the same character who mentions the bunnies. Double bonus points
if it's a macho man who's meant to be really tough but is still calling them
+A character whose only weapon is a pink highlighter with just enough ink left in it
for one word.
+(This one courtesy of Shona, who I'm talking to on MSN and just got Rickrolled by
another friend) Character on the internet googling themselves somehow gets

Anybody willing to add in their own suggestions?

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