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This diary entry is written by x_InfamePimpcess. ( View all entries )
Previous entry: My sick obsession pt 1 in category Sick Obsession

My Sick Obsession pt 2Category: Sick Obsession
Tuesday, 17 September 2013
08:47:51 PM (GMT)
I can still remember how I fell for you.. Do you remember how you fell for me? Was
it the way I would always have something to say back to you, was it the way I could
always make you laugh without trying or was it that summer where we talked from the
moment our eyes opened until the sun rose the next morning? Well, what was it?
Because I'm sure you remember none of that. I can still remember the feeling of
waking up with butterflies in my stomach because I was so nervous to talk to you. I
can still remember any and every little thing about you. I never thought that
infatuation was real, until I met you. When I met you, I never thought that I would
crave another person as much as I did you. I wanted to know about every little aspect
of you. I wanted to pay attention to the way that you would throw your hair up in a
bun or a pony tail. I paid attention to the way that you would write your letters. I
noticed the way that you would speak and what each thing you would say meant.. I can
still remember the way that the sun would high light your eyes at the right angle,
the way that your voice would crack when you would get upset.. Any little thing that
there was to know about you, I knew it. But you were never able to say the same about
me, were you?...I didn't think so. While I was learning the smallest details about
you, you were worried about learning them about someone else. Someone who, someone
who just lusted for your body neither anything else. While I on the other hand,
lusted for your soul. Every word that you would say, I hung on. While the only thing
that he hung on was the frame of your body and the thoughts of the things that he'd
be able to do to you. How does it feel to know that was the only thing that he was
after? You chose the lust for sex over the lust of love. Every time that something
went wrong with you and him, you came back to me like a boomerang. But, imagine if
one day, I wasn't there to hold you up like I did before. You were my sick obsession.
I didn't care how you were in my life, all I cared about was that you were in it... I
didn't care to realize that I was helping you try and mend your relationship with the
asshole who fucked up what we could have had, better yet, that helped YOU fuck up
what we had. It didn't matter. I just needed to hear the sound of your voice, I never
forgot what it sounded like, I still to this day could remember every vibration for
every noise that you would make. I can still remember how you would pronounce every
single word in your vocabulary, how you would hold certain syllables for just those
few seconds longer.. I remember the come backs that you would say to certain phrases.
I now realize that, I was enthralled in the idea of you, I was infatuated in the
thought of you loving me and caring for me like I thought you did.. I remember
everything about our conversations, every word and punctuation, where I was when we
would talk. I remember the date of our first phone call, I remember everything. But,
I'm sure you've forgotten all of that once someone elses physical appearance caught
your eye. But I mean, why would you stay with the person who gave you the world on a
silver platter- including the moon and the stars- when there was someone who made you
do that for them. I hope your happy. And don't miss me when I'm gone, because I'm
sure as hell done missing you.

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