Wednesday, 12 August 2009
11:54:10 AM (GMT)
I was summoned to the Chief Robot in Command of Everything today. He asked me if I
felt I was doing a good enough job as a Robot of Doom and whether there was anything
I felt he could do to help me become better at being a Robot of Doom. I told him that
I thought I was doing a fine job but that there is always room for improvement. It's
always a good idea not to act cocky in front of the Chief Robot in Command of
Afterwards I went for a coffee with Jenny. And by that I mean I watched Jenny
drinking coffee from across a table. She was moaning about some boy or other who
would/wouldn't do something she desired/detested. I nodded my head and made the
appropriate noises at the appropriate moments to appease her. She told me she likes
my company but my lie detecting sensor nodule alerted me to the fact that she wasn't
being entirely truthful. It's possible that my lie detecting sensor nodule is faulty
though. Or at least that's what I keep telling myself.
To cheer myself up when I got home I made a list of my favourite five things humans
have told me before I disintegrated them.
1. "But.. but.. who shall look after my thirty seven cats?"
2. "With that thing? Good luck pal."
3. "I have money. Lots of money! And a potato chip in the shape of Phil
4. "You look like a girl I met on a bus this one time."
5. "What the fuck? I ordered a stripper not a Robot of Doom!"