Tuesday, 23 October 2007
10:13:38 PM (GMT)
This is one of the best years in my life so far, I'm sure. I'm taking two amazing
classes! (Fine arts and AP Art History) The rest are okay or a breeze so I'm all
good. I just need to work harder in Precal and start doing my West Civ homework as
soon as it's assigned. ^^;;
Fine arts...I have received so much encouragement from other students and teachers
that I can't even explain the joy and elation that bubbles inside me. I have waited
for this much anticipated class for three years and it's going perfectly!
College apps are getting me nervous but I've already had one of my teachers agree to
a recommendation (for a much needed college and program). I need to fill out two
applications within the next two weeks though... ;_;
Stumbling upon Kupika has done so much for me, even if it hasn't been even a week!!!
Deviantart used to give me this feeling but then it started getting depressing over
there... Kupika has it's drama but I've been lucky to be only a spectator. I was one
of this drama spectators on Deviantart but it interfered with my art so I stopped
going there for a while. I'm thinking of going back there in Dec. probably.
The people on Kupika are the best btw. ^__________________^
Today, one of my friends (IRL) told me I had become too serious. He says many of the
seniors (including me) have become too serious this year. It kind of scares me. I
don't want to give people the wrong impression of me.
You see, I love doing random things for the fun of it...but I also like to prioritize
and get the tasks assigned to me done before having fun. I can be crazy and loony at
times but I often move on to a "serious" or working mode that won't end until I
finish through whatever. I probably don't seem like that here, on Kupika.
Or do I?
I also just found out that the guy who has liked/loved (or so he used to always tell
me) me for years now has a BOYFRIEND. I don't have a problem with him or his
boyfriend because I was never attracted back to him anyway but...I feel jealous by at
least 2% (remember, I never liked him back, only wondered about the "what ifs") and
ask myself now: "Why do I attract guys like this? Is this why the only guy I EVER
wanted only resolved to push me back?"
This sadistic boy would tease and comfort me only to push me away later... The
sweetest, most helpful and caring guy LOVED me. This is what others tried to convince
me and he later got a boyfriend. And then the one boy I almost loved...went away
after pushing me back.
Why are these the guys in my life?
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