Thursday, 14 May 2009
02:00:06 AM (GMT)
didnt write yesterday i was so tired from vermont and dance to write anything day
sucked my besti friend hates me, best friend is being more distent, mom is bieng
horid runiinde half the chance of me getting a job, and i curenlty have the strongest
ugrge to cut sigh......
in other news i updated twitter reaveld that i was a previous cutter havnt cut
in a year at least not in my way you seeeeeeeee some indebt insider about me is that
i dont or didnt take a simple razer to my arms and make lots of tiny little lines all
over my arms nooooooo i used a verity to make my cuts big and deep. sometimes i would
hurt the intended area with a bruise or scratch up my arm perposly by doing
something(falling getting in a way of a punch etc) then take some sharp object and
dig/cut into my arm. it's easier and more belivable to lie about what it is and since
im a fast healer by the time anyone notices its already scabs and partial scar that
will fade no mater how deep. other times when the mood stuck or something happend i
would go somewere alone when no one would notice me gone and cut with what ever, my
nails, the edge of a table, metal object, sisiores, knives, combos almost any thing
can be used to hurt yourself with. havent done that in sooooolong( i miss it) some
times the urge IS so grate i can feel the trobing in my arm but i have stayed away
somewhat i have takan a razer once or twice to some part of me but i stoped right
away wasnt the same feel didnt feel it cuting into my skin at all so depressing.
anyyyyyyyyways since i didnt up date yeterday also soaid i hate crying tehehe i used
both of these on kairy and here im a cheater ^_^ ...................... best get to
sleep so i can wake up early and finish my home work.............
p.s. why the hell dont i cut anymore?