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This diary entry is written by Lucy_Destroys_Humanity. ( View all entries )
 
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Me ranting about shit on my mind. :/Category: Rambling
Wednesday, 21 March 2012
04:47:53 PM (GMT)
A lot of shit is on my mind. I am having trouble telling people what happened to me
and my best friend so I'm going to let everything out right here. I don't give a shit
if you think things are worst for you cause most likely you don't know what its like
for everyone you ever cared about to leave your life. Well first of all Sunday me and
my best friend Katie got into a fight. I tried telling her what happened Saturday
cause I was feeling like shit and she told me to leave the house. The way I said my
next comment was kinda bitchy and thats when we started fighting. It pretty much went
back and forth between the two of us like any other fight. She told me I was
"careless bitch" and then we stopped talking. Monday I tried apologizing but she
refused to accept it. She then started talking about suicide and then I snapped
saying "and you call ME selfish when your over there talking about suicide!!!!" She
said it was for her boyfriend Paul cause she constantly hurts him and then I said "so
now I'm fucking nonexistant to you considering you've always put your boyfriends
before me, your best friend!" And then she blamed herself for shit and she logged off
Facebook(Only way we can talk to each other cause she lives in Ireland). While she
was logged off I asked her two Questions:
1. Are you gonna leave me like everybody else has?
2. Why the fuck is it when I'm happy people have to make my life hell?

Also, I'm sick of my family fighting all the time. Like Saturday when my mom was
screaming at my dad and my sister telling him he's ruined her childhood. My dad still
thinks I'm all innocent and don't know whats going on so he doesn't harass me like he
harasses my sister and my mom. But its affecting me the most because I can't
concentrate in school cause I'm worried I'm gonna come home to my dad lying dead on
the floor. Also usually my parents have fought the night before or the morning right
before I head off to school. So I still can't concentrate. I'm failing a couple of
subjects because of these issues and I need therapy but my family is poor cause my
dad doesn't work and when he does he can't keep a job for 2 weeks cause he prefers
getting drunk then supporting the family. My mom had to get a job in Boston so she
comes home late every day so I'm practically alone. My sister is in college btw. I
rarely hang out with friends cause they hang out with other friends. So I try my best
to role play to get my mind off of things but once the screaming starts I can't help
but cry my eyes out. People say its normal to have a breakdown EVERY SO OFTEN but not
EVERY FUCKING DAY!
Last edited: 25 May 2012

Comments 
‹Hypochondriac› says:   21 March 2012   978991  
*huggies* T-T i wish i could make you happy~!!!!!!!!
 
Lucy_Destroys_Humanity says:   21 March 2012   898136  
@missmissthegr8 
Aw! Thanks but at this point nothing can really make me feel better. I
miss her to death but she'll never come back to U.S 
 
‹Hypochondriac› says:   21 March 2012   294893  
@Lucy_Destroys_Humanity 
*huggies and epic cuddles* 
 
Lucy_Destroys_Humanity says:   21 March 2012   619937  
@missmissthegr8 
Aw thankies possible random person I have never met though I could be
wrong and we could have spoken before. LOL

Btw I wrote all of this diary in a study after exams. I of course
wasn't aloud to go on here but I did it anywhere cause I'm a bad kid
like that. 
 
‹Hypochondriac› says:   21 March 2012   241516  
@Lucy_Destroys_Humanity 
:o and i think we have spoken before XD you're on my friends list 
 
Lucy_Destroys_Humanity says:   21 March 2012   459309  
@missmissthegr8 
Oh. Thats depressing. Well I know we haven't spoken within this month
cause after that I have no idea who you are. I saw you added me but I
don't remember talking to you cause there are so many people I talk
with but never read their messages cause I'm too lazy and prefer my
role plays over actually communicated with human beings. Its kinda
funny: in rl you could hate someones gut but when your role playing
your characters could be madly in love...... or you can have them hate
each other like you hate each other in rl. 
 
‹Hypochondriac› says:   21 March 2012   570372  
@Lucy_Destroys_Humanity 
true :3 i roleplay pretty much constantly, for the same reason 
 
Lucy_Destroys_Humanity says:   21 March 2012   572293  
@missmissthegr8 
Yah plus at times its really entertaining though the beginnings always
difficult. Like figuring out how your characters meet and what not and
if you want a story line it gets even more complicated and then you
end up picking something you read in a book cause you can't think of
any ideas. 
 
‹Hypochondriac› says:   21 March 2012   131174  
@Lucy_Destroys_Humanity 
happened alot of times :3 so i usually let the other person think of
something lol 
 
Lucy_Destroys_Humanity says:   21 March 2012   187131  
@missmissthegr8 
xD Yah sometimes I do that. Its even more of a pain in the ass when
you don't know what to say or do. 
 
‹Hypochondriac› says:   21 March 2012   999085  
@Lucy_Destroys_Humanity 
happens alot XD 
 
Lucy_Destroys_Humanity says:   21 March 2012   263766  
@missmissthegr8 
Yah it sucks. xD 
 
‹Hypochondriac› says:   21 March 2012   763834  
 
Lucy_Destroys_Humanity says:   21 March 2012   931668  
@missmissthegr8 
Good times role playin though lol. Especially during Dungeons and
Dragons. 
 
‹Hypochondriac› says:   21 March 2012   355584  
@Lucy_Destroys_Humanity 
never played that :o 
 
Lucy_Destroys_Humanity says :   22 March 2012   761673  
@missmissthegr8 
Its a table top role playing game. Its really fun. You can practically
do anything you want as long as the dungeon master allows it. He's
practically the God of DnD. My Dm is my last year science teacher. 
 
 
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