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This diary entry is written by CrazyMeaghanJellieBeanie. ( View all entries )
Previous entry: As For You, in category Random Meaghan

In the Grips of YouCategory: Book/Horror/Mystery/Fictional/Superstous/Romance
Friday, 10 September 2010
02:01:56 AM (GMT)
Okay So I've Had This Idea For The Past Two Weeks, And I Needed A Way To Start It
Off And Finally I Found Away Thanks To One Of My New Assistant Teachers, Using Common
Symbols And There Meanings, It Was The Kind Of Beginnig I Wanted, Anyways Here's The
Story And Some Songs To Go With It. 

Intro-The XX

Black Roses Red-Alana Grace

Already Over-Red

Breathe Into Me-Red


The Fantasy-30 Seconds To Mars

Face Down-Red Jumsuit Apparatus 

*Lol A Lot Of Songs By Red!*

Chapter One; Mirrors of Unreality

“Now Avery tell me what you see, don’t resist it, just let the images come to
you. Relax and let your mind wander where it wants to.” Dr. Carver said as my eyes
slowly closed, and I became calm and had a blank mind.
“I-I see a forest before’s full of bright green leaves, the only dark
green would be the pine needles on the pine trees, but even that green seems right...
there’s fresh streams and waterfalls that are the brightest blue... I can see ahead
of my clearly, there isn’t a path but I can see clearly, the ground is made of all
dirt and twigs that have fallen from trees, a few leafs. The air smells of fresh
rain, dirt and pine trees...oh there’s a bear not to far ahead of looks
lonely and hungry...I-I for some reason want to feed it, I’m picking blueberries
and after I’ve handed them over the bear just walks didn’t try to
attack me, it’s strange... I walk on for a little bit more when I stumble across
something shiny and golden on the ground, it’s a-a heart shaped key...I’m
intrigued by it and brush away the dirt from where it laid, underneath is a old
wooden door, there’s the lock for the heart shaped key... but it’s jammed with
dirt. I look around for something to help un-jam it and see a light blue plain cup
not too far away, I retrieve the cup and fill it up with water before I pour it on
the lock, it helps un-jam it and I stick the key in and open the door. Upon stepping
through the door I enter into a flat clear landscape of lush green... nothing for
miles, the forest is far away now and I’m lying down, it was almost as if it was
all a dream.” I said while looking at every image with a clear open mind.
“Good Avery now can you open yo—” I suddenly clutched the sides of the couch I
was lying down on and felt death and despair take over me.
“No! Everything’s becoming dark! I can’t see the ground! The forest is on
fire—there are red gleaming eyes...something...”
“Avery, Avery please calm down, it’s okay!” Dr. Carver tried to reach me,
snapping her fingers to make me come out of the dream. 
“IT’S COMING FOR ME! I can’t move! I can’t do anything, I’m scared and
terrified, it has me in its grips and it knows it! Oh my god, oh my god! It’s going
to kill me!” I scream out as I watch the dark figure with gleaming red eyes
encircle me, with its fast motions, its eyes taunting me for it knows what happens. 
“Avery!” Dr. Carver tries again, gripping my hand this time; I can feel her but
not see her.
“NO! Stay away from me! No!!” My screams and protests become louder and
desperate; I slap Dr. Carver away and fall off from the couch. 
THREE! 1, 2, 3!” Suddenly the world I was in falls away, the mysterious man with
gleaming red eyes winks at me and gave me a smile as he dissolves into thin air with
the rest of the images. I open my eyes to the therapy room, Dr. Carver on the ground
with her clipboard and pen, heaving in air as her eyes show all the shock that she is
feeling. My eyes start to water and I grab my mouth as tears spill down.
“N-No...I’m sorry...I’m so sorry!”  I cry as I realize how hard I must have
hit my Dr. Dr. Carver regains herself and walks over to me, sitting down beside me
she rubs my back and puts away her clipboard and pen.
“Avery it’s alright, all I want you to do for me now is tell me, is this the
exact same dream that you have been seeing for awhile now?” Dr. Carver questions
me, I wipe away the tears with my oversized long sleeved shirt and look at her, the
woman wasn’t old, maybe around her mid forties and was an amazing doctor. He soft
blonde hair was pulled up into a ponytail and her gray eyes gleamed at me as she
searched my face for any sign of answer.
“Y-yes I keep having that dream...that is the dream that scares me and makes me
randomly lash out...” I whispered. Dr. Carver’s soft hand pats my head and
smooths out my hair as she looks at me with effcionate eyes, I feel bad, horrible,
how could I have hit the person trying to help me? Dr. Carver sensing how I’m
feeling reaches out to grab my hand while gathering up her clipboard and pen again.
“Now sadly our time is up Avery, but I want you to do this homework for me, if any
of these things relate to you, please mark them down and explain why, we’ll talk
about the extensive meaning of them next time, okay?” Dr. Carver asks me, I nod my
head and take the paper from her, looking at what’s on it.

Common Symbols

Water-fertility, life-giving, rebirth, purification, and redemption
Stagnant or polluted water-corruption, evil
Fire-destruction, purification, passion, death
Earth-baseness, fertility
Air/wind-spirits, freedom, inspiration
Sun-wisdom, vision, power, life-giving, regeneration
Sunrise-birth, rebirth, joy and hope
Mountains- obstacles, achievement, aspirations, awe, glory
Storms-death, evil, inner turmoil 
Roads, ships, trains, railroads etc-journeys
Fork in the road/crossroads-choices, decisions
Doors/gates/arches-escape, opportunities, utopias, fantasy worlds, freedom
Bridges-transitions, crossing over
Walls/fences/hedges-barriers, divider lines, prisons
Windows-freedom, longing, imprisonment
Mirrors-illusion, unreality, passage to other worlds
Circle-unity, wholeness
Gardens-paradise, innocence, fertility
Desert- spiritual aridity, death, hopelessness, sterility
Lamb-innocence, Christ
Black-evil, death, despair
White-innocence, good, redemption
Red-war, passion, love, blood, vengeance, anger
Green-growth, renewal, life, nature, envy
Yellow-sun, happiness, cowardice, betrayal 

       Almost immdetly I could pick out all the ones that applied to me, and the ones
that did, did not look too good.
        “Alright then, I will be seeing you next therapy session, have a good
weekend and winter Avery.” Dr. Carver said as she helped me pack up my stuff, I
waved to her goodbye as she held the door open for me and quickly stuffed the sheet
of paper inside my knitted beige bag. No, what I thought seemed to just click with me
was not couldn’t be...
       “How was therapy class darling?” I looked up from my hopeful thinking to
see my mother with her long black hair tied up and waiting for me by the car, I gave
her a smile and then rushed over to her for a hug, she kissed my forehead and rubbed
my back before opening the passenger side door to let me in.
     “It was alright.” I answered my mother as she hopped into the driver’s
seat and started the car, fright shot through me, accidents could happen in cars...I
mentally slapped myself then and took deep breathes, my mom was a fine driver and we
wouldn’t get in a crash because of that. But because of my un-rational fear of
driving, I had not yet gotten my drivers license and walked to school every day.
That’s why I was in therapy really, these crazy messed up dreams, the fears over
silly little things that a sixteen year old shouldn’t be afraid of. Also, three
years ago I had started cutting myself just to release myself from the pain and fear
that I felt from the crazy dreams that felt so real and the stupid fears. And due to
my problems, I missed school a lot and was labelled as a freak...As if I didn’t
already know that.  But I didn’t let it get to me...instead I was working on
becoming better, and my mom had been great for me, she’s always been great. After
dad left when I was eleven she took on four jobs and raised me all by herself, and
now she had moved to a new town to give me a fresh start, because she truly wanted
what was best for me...she wanted me cured and to be able to go to school fine
without mental torments and taunting. 

*Note This Is The Unfinished Version, I'm Still Working On It =P* Also I May Change
The Name, But For Now I Have Nothing Better XD

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