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This diary entry is written by alphaquberg. ( View all entries )
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ive never had that chance ... (social akwardness gotta hate it)Category: (general)
Thursday, 15 December 2011
10:20:12 PM (GMT)
sorrrryy i have not wrote a diary in a little while ive been just a bit busy getting
ready for Saturdays performance  I'm excited to do it i cant w8 this will be my first
actual public performance in front of ppl but I'm also prettty nervous and worried
I'm going to get stage freight or mess up, or embarrass my self i know its normal to
worry, i just don't wanna make the dance studio look bad haha. I've also been busy
with school work and stuff doing this and that. i have my history world war 2 report
to do and chemestry report to do its not due till after Christmas tho so i should
have no problem getting either done. ( and when i write these i tend to talk alot
might as well get used to it ) 

sometimes i do have alot of free time but no one ever rlly  invites me to come hang
out with them  ( maybe its bc im in a school full of country ppl, not saying theres
anything wrong with country ppl , some are cool ) they're have been a few times here
and there but not often xD  not even the dancers!, i dont mind that they dont tho
cause im sure they are busy and stuff and see enough of me at dance and dont wanna
hang with me out side of dance lol (;.but watev's. 

lol i dont have alot of social skills cause up until ....pretty much this year i
think, everyone thought of me as a - dork, loser, outsider, weirdo nobody.. u get the
point and no one wanted to hang with me and even now i cant say on a friday night -
hey mom im going out to hang with some friends to night ill be back at _______ or hey
mom can u drop me off at ____ i wanna hang with some friends or hey mom can u take me
over to _________ 's house because/so i can/i want to/ were going to __________.  idk
i just feel left out on the whole lviving it up teen experience haha its kinda too
late now i guess cause im already 17 will be 18 in june, ive never been to a concert
in my entire life ever, ive never gone to the beach with just friends, ive never gone
to the mall with friends to just walk around i could go on for a while..

well thats pretty much just it i think its better i talk about this stuff here even
if no one reads it  cause i dont really have some to talk bout this stuff in the real
world with, of course i have my best friends and such but they would think im
over-dramatic and probably wouldn't talk to me haha,  i just have a bit of social
anxiety is all. im starting to get it under control more these days cause im not left
at home to think hard upon these things thats one of the reasons i love dance cause
when im there every thing, thought etc from and about the outside world goes away c:
and i try and put on a good mask for the people around me when im out in the world so
they dont see how troubled i really am cause then everyone would think im a nut case
.. but on the good side my life has started ti get better ever since i joined dance!
(= ( trying to keep the whole stay positive going on ) and yea thats pretty much it
kthxbai -alpha (= 

sorry if i dragged on if u read all of it i appreciate you actually taking the time
to read it ur amazing if u did
Last edited: 17 December 2011

aireeole says:   17 December 2011   878953  
you can come to ANY of the dancers for anything. (:
we won't make fun of you if you tell us ANYTHING you need to get out.
and hey, you're not the only one..
I'm REALLY shy, so I don't have THAT many friends.
But what I did was stay positive and I actually made a lot of new
friends this year!
so keep your head up, & stay positive, because it really works. c:
alphaquberg says:   17 December 2011   288238  
ur amazing ariel c: appreciate it
aireeole says:   17 December 2011   352893  
haha. :D anytime.
‹kaylee<3› says:   20 December 2011   832121  

dylan. we're here for you. and i'm totally up for hanging out by the
way! ;D 
alphaquberg says :   20 December 2011   972582  
@Eelyak thxx  kayleez c: and yess we totally have to hang out


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