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:O uh-oh...am I actually in love?Category: (general)
Monday, 13 June 2011
08:20:46 PM (GMT)
uh-oh :O 
there is this guy at my school. I liked him last year and he found out (lets call him
Daniel). he blocked me on msn. i stopped liking him. I started hating him. Then my
friend gave me hope that he might have liked me. somehow she gave me hope. and i
liked him a bit, not as much as last time. then christmas break went by. no one knew
I liked him, no one could tell, and it definately wasn't obvious. He didn't
know I liked him.  Then we went back to school. his birthday is a day before mine,
and for once he didn't brag about it. (we don't really talk much...like at all...i
don't make any effort to talk to him. I don't want to force my presence on someone
who might not like it) I thought it was ironic because the day of his birthday was a
bad day for many. i told my friend this saying it's funny how everything's going
wrong and it's his birthday. we were just a couple steps away from the door and he
walked out of the room. it was hard to tell if he heard what i said. then one day i
was just looking around during a presentation and i don't know if he was too or if he
was looking at me the whole time but all of a sudden I was looking into his eyes, his
were looking into mine. I just about jumped. It was thrilling, I was like woah! I'm
looking into this guys eyes that I like a little! :O then I looked away. moments like
this happened more often, but I wasn't as surprised when they did. then he tried
talking to me on msn. that day I felt like you know what i hate you and your mean and
your a showoff so i said hi? back to his hey which may have discouraged him...then
the next day I had to muster up all my courage to ask him something about homework. I
wasn't even calling him, it was just on msn. My heart leaped out of my chest as i
awaited his reply!! but when I asked I said sorry to bother you but...
because I never talk to him and stuff...and sometimes I would see him looking at me.
by this time i liked him more than just a little. but when I saw him looking at me, i
couldn't get myself to look back. He broke my heart once, i wasn't anxious to get it
broken again. then he went on vacation. i missed him. he came back. (and he had a
gorgeous tan!!!!! :D xD) he was in my group for this one thing and in the one
sentence I said to no one in particular he looked up from what he was reading and
looked me in the eye. he looked frustrated when i refused to look back at him. then
he danced with her. my heart was crushed. i never wanted to talk to him again. i
heard he talked to her often. she was (is) pretty and popular lets call her katie
(it's not her real name but w.e.). i think she's a lot prettier than me :P he slow
danced with her. and I'm not sure, but whenever he faced me, i felt like he was
looking at me...but it was dark in there. then the next day I'm standing in line and
he comes up to stand in line too, and he was like a couple inches away...I always
give people space in lines, but he just stood right there. he was invading my
personal space. one day im smiling and laughing at something and he just looks at me
and smiles...i wasn't even laughing at him. (that's happened before with some other
guy...apparently i look so much prettier when i smile) i think by dancing with katie
he was just trying to make me jealous. then a couple days ago we were working on this
thing in the hallway with my group and one of the people in my group said we have the
two loudest people in our class, (him) and ___________. and I said, ya i know right?
and turns out he was in the hallway with his group. :S im wondering if he heard :S
he's been looking kinda down and thoughtful  and day dreaming and gloomy
lately. all i can think is that I'm putting him through misery. i feel so bad. he's
always loud and happy and laughing. but lately I'm getting used to that frown.
 then today i over heard one of his friends (lets call him Nathan) on the bus talk
about Katie. Nathan said something like Katie likes Daniel (what were calling the guy
I like) and he asked why he's not dating her he's got like no wheels and then Daniel
said he didn't want her to like him and he didn't feel like being a wheeler and I've
had as my status that personality does matter and be nice to people and stuff...but
he doesn't want her to like him and she's the most popular, prettiest girl!! and he's
popular and like really cute? and I'm not popular? i don't hang out with the huge
group, big groups scare me.
I'm not hungry lately -.- COULD I BE IN LOVE WITH HIM!!!!!!??????0_o thanks for
actually reading! <3

‹Kairos› says :   13 June 2011   861967  
I dnt think youre in love no offense, it seems like an innocent game
of jealousy and crushing. See, the fact that you likes him alo bt he
didn't like you back broke your heart. You age him space but because
he rejected you your name prob came up in his mind continuously to the
point where hes starin at you at clas. At the dance he plays that game
too-jealousy- because he's prob changed his mind. He tried toget your
attention and tried to laugh along because he wants to know you
better. I'd say if you still got the butterflies than you are big time
crushing and if you for sure know he likes youback but he's too shy
and wants to take things slowly, make a move not harsh but gentle to
let him know your into him and he's not like other guys you may hang
with. Tease a bit, its a form of flirting with the innocence still


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