Tuesday, 9 June 2009
11:27:52 PM (GMT)
I went to see shaymin last weekend. I don't F%#$ing care what you think, that flying
hedgehog is a badass mofo.
He walked up to me like "You Lusario?" and I was like "Hell yeah!" and Shaymin was
like "I can break your ears off with my bare hands" and I was like "Whoa! hot DAMN!
Let's be friends." and we ate manly things like BROTWURST and RAW FISH. It was
AMAZING until darkrai came along like "Guys, I'm loooost, can I have directions?" and
he kept being whiny and emo at us and shaymin was like "MINDLESS STREAM OF PROFANITY"
and darkrai gave us this reeeallly dirty look and then we both fell asleep. I woke up
a few days later in a river.
So this really cool gyarados helped us out and was like "GET OUT OF MY LAWN" and we
were like "OK" but really shaymin was like "YOUR MOM" and they got into a battle. Now
like, Since shaymin is so badass he taught that overgrown magikarp a lesson. But
like, we weren't expecting kyogre.
Here's the thing about Kyogre, he's like.. Huge. And powerful. And shaymin, No matter
HOW badass, can not beat a giant mother-effing whale from hell.
So we ran like sissies. But shaymin ran less like a sissy-sissy and more like a
galloping stallion in small hedgehog form. And then he flew away.
And I was left there to face kyogre. I was no match for the most epic whale ever.
Moral of the story: give darkrai the goddamn directions.