Wednesday, 19 July 2017
04:46:07 AM (GMT)
My shite writing.
There is always a moment in your life, when everything you are going through, and
everything you have been through feel unbearable. As if suddenly someone pushed your
head beneath the water, and now you cannot breathe. Who knows, maybe for you, this
feeling is constant. As if there is a weight sitting idly on your chest, and you just
don't have the strength to lift it. You feel alone, despite how many people are
standing around you, trying to hold your attention for just one moment, so that maybe
you won't overthink the things going on around you. It's a struggle. Trying to
breathe when it feels as if there is no oxygen surrounding you. You try to scream
out, but when you open your mouth, there is nothing but silence.
That silence? It's the absolute worst thing you have to deal with. The silence,
pounding in your ears like a jackhammer on pavement. Breaking down the walls in your
head and grasping on to every wrong word, and broken promise. The silence is
deafening, because no matter how hard you try, you cannot break it. It's finds it's
way into the deepest corners of your mind, extracting hurt feelings that you didn't
know still existed. Trust me, I know the effects that silence can have on ones mind.
Sometimes I drive myself crazy, overthinking, and breaking down every little word a
person has said to me in the past week. This silence torments you and I. There could
be a room full of people roaring with laughter, and happy conversation, and the
silence would still be there. Echoing throughout our eardrums as if we were beneath
the surface, hiding from human interaction.
I will promise you something. The silence will not stay. It does have an end. One
moment, after days, weeks, or even years of this deafening silence, you will hear a
note. Soon after that single note, a song will begin to penetrate the silence in your
head, and you will be able to smile. Even if the silence does come back, you will
have hope now. You know it will not stay, and you will hear your beautiful song once