Monday, 15 November 2010
02:24:37 AM (GMT)
Mkay, this story is in fact about Child Abuse
It was written by ME.
Now you may begin reading (;
Why Won't You Love Me, Mum?
Dark, scarlet blood.
She simply just watched it roll down her own cheek, the pain stinging her but it was
eased by a numb feeling she couldn't comprehend. Her hazel eyes red and puffy, her
dry and sore and her skin pale and ghost like, in contrast to her blood that simply
continued to drip as if they were her tears.
The cut on the left-side of her head, was deep but not deep enough to require
her mother made sure of that. It was only deep enough to hurt and scar.
Some scars were permanent such as the one on her shoulder blade, and others leaving
a faint mark that would be barely visible. This scar was no different to the rest. It
a deep cut from the top of hairline on the left side of her head and scarring until
aligned with the top of her ear.
She simply looked at herself in the mirror and then to her blood covered hands.
An hour ago her mother had stumbled into the house, her words slurred and loud and
breath reeking of alcohol. Her face red and eyes full of anger. She had obediently
to her mothers call, like a puppy coming to its master. She listened to her words,
filling her with hurt. She let her grab her hair roughly and force her against the
She screamed and cried.
But not because of the physical pain her mother gave her.
Her mother always made sure to scar her, when she saw a scar heal on her own
body, she made sure to give her a new one. She used her kitchen knife while forcing
daughters head against the wall and slowing slicing her delicate skin. She simply
whimpered and her mothers words were soft but not in a soothing way. She always said
same thing, when she scarred her. “This will teach you to never mess with your
mother,”; her voice repeated in her head. Soft yet the tone cruel and sadistic.
Her mother had passed out on the couch after that, and she had run into the
locking herself in. Though instead of cleaning the blood that dripped down on the
or on her flower-printed dress, she simply stared at herself.
She called her ugly and unworthy.
She made her believe that.
She was simply only an eight-year old girl.
People said she was intelligent for her age.
Her mother said otherwise.
So she believed that as well.
She believed that if she really was smart, her mother would actually be proud and
She prepared their dinner for the night, her hands shaky as she tried to carry the
bowl of spaghetti in her small hands. She felt the heat of the house drown her, her
dripping on her new scar, making it sting slightly. Placing it on the table, she
the plate that was her mothers and scooped five, big wooden spoonfuls onto it.
She brought the plate over to her mothers room, where she laid on her bed, flipping
through channels on the television. Her expression bored, her eyes red and she had
woken up with a hangover. Placing the plate on the night stand next to her, she
her mother wearily.
Her mother turned around and looked at her with the look of hatred. “Leave the
she said hoarsely with a stern voice.
She nodded slightly and walked out the room, closing the door behind her. She sighed
walked back into the kitchen where the leftovers of spaghetti was.
She ate while searching through their computer, her homework being finished and her
chores done. Her spare time was spent on the computer. She liked the website called
Billion Secrets' reading what ran through peoples minds and problems they had was
something she could relate to.
She bit her lip, she always wanted to type her problem onto the website, hoping
could save her. She could hear the noise of the television that came from her
room loud and clear. She looked back at the screen and shakily clicked 'Tell us your
Her small fingers hovered over the keys.
One by one she began to type slowly
My name is Lily Logan, I'm eight years old, I've never met my father and my mother
me, and all I keep wondering to myself, every night is....
Why won't you love me mum?
This one is a bit more...brutal... So be prepared.
Why Won't You Love Me, Mum?
Why Won't you Love me Mum?
There was time where she was happy one time in her life.
She looked out her window that night, the stars shining brightly out there. The night
beautiful, but at times it was a nightmare, when her mother would walk in that is.
was in a deep slumber, where you would need a huge drum set to wake her up.
Her breaths were quiet and short. She surrounded herself by her thin blanket.
Trying to know what a mothers love felt like was complicated.
But she knew what love felt like.
She loved a little puppy dog when she was five, unknown to her mother of course. The
puppy was a stray, she found her on her way home from school. The puppy had come to
and she had given her half her sandwich. She was a golden retriever, her fur a light
brown colour, and she had fur soft like cotton. She called her Miracle, something
always wished for.
Miracle stayed hidden in her room, under her bed or her blankets. Miracle was such a
small puppy and could be easily be mistaken for one of her stuff toys. Lily loved
with all her little heart could muster. She'd sneak half of her food in her into her
pockets or wrap them in tissues to give to her. Though she couldn't hide Miracle
- - 3 years ago - -
Her giggles were only heard within her room, as she crawled around the floor. Hearing
sounds of light footsteps behind her, she turned brightly to see the small pup
her. Her tail wagging happily and her tongue sticking out as she looked at her owner
her big brown eyes.
She jumped on her owner playfully, licking her cheeks and staying close to her.
affection and admiration for each other was strong.
Miracle chased her around her room, Lily's giggles getting alittle louder each time.
occasional squeal and Miracle's occasional yapping. In truth Lily always loved this
She loved Miracle more than anything. She loved the warm feeling that flowed around
stomach, she loved that she couldn't stop smiling or giggling, she may be young and
innocent but she was smart enough to know what these feelings were. It was simply
love. But it was as strong as anything, Lily knew that it was and Miracle loved her,
may be a dog, but you could see in her eyes that she loved her back, just as much.
But the happiness was silenced.
Lily could feel the gasp escaping her mouth, and Miracle stared at her curiously.
could hear the jangling of keys and the turning of the knob downstairs. As fast as
could motioned the dog to go under her bed, who obeyed. She could feel the thumping
her heart pound against her chest, as she heard the squeak of the front door.
She heard heavy footsteps, the pace uneven. Her groaning was loud, and the sound of
shattering on the floor. She was drunk, even worse.
She can feel the dizziness slowly overcoming on her, her mothers screams were
into her ears, and everything felt as if it were going faster. Her footsteps
louder and louder, but all she heard was her heart pounding against her chest, as if
were about to break her chest. She could hear Miracle's quiet whimpers only faintly.
head kept telling her to get out of the room, but she it was if she was nailed to
Then there was the pounding on her door, the screams and threats being spat at. She
see the rusty hinges move, she prayed that they wouldn't break. She could feel sweat
slowly rolling down her forehead. She winced as the slow turning of the doorknob
screeched in her ears. She knew then, she was too late.
"Pest!" her voice screeched as her mothers, opened the door with such force, "what
you doing here? Why is your room a mess?"
Her voice had disappeared the moment she saw the hot burning fire in her mothers
She snarled at her and walked towards her. Grabbing her by her neck, and letting her
"I asked you a question, pest," she spat at her, her small hands grasped her larger
as she winced at how tight her mother gripped her. Her gasps for breath only made
mother hiss at her.
"Not talking?" she growled, she shook her. Lily suddenly felt the dizziness overcome
Her mother continued to shake her, and keep her grip around her neck.
"Please," she gasped," please....st...stop," her head started to pound and the rest
her body was numb. She felt as if she were going to vomit.
"What was that?" she stopped shaking her, her breath reeking, only making it harder
breathe. She stayed silent, whatever she said was wrong.
Before she knew it, she felt her fragile body being slammed against the wall. She
the crack of her shoulder blades, her mouth gaped open, having to scream at the pain,
no sound would escape her mouth.
She knew her mother was about to beat her, but her fist had stop mid-way before she
screamed and released her death grip on her. Lily had landed a heap on the floor,
body completely numb and her sight hazy.
That's when she saw what her mother had gripped, her heart coming to a stop. She
her hand strangle Miracles neck. She could hear her yelping loud and clear, and her
mothers angry screaming.
"Damn mutt!" she screamed, as she held the dog on the floor, her whimpers and yelps,
tearing Lily's heart. She watched her mother bang her fist down on Miracle's
The whimpering and yelping no longer escaping the dogs mouth. All was heard was her
mothers scream and the pounding of her fist hitting the, poor lifeless puppy.
All that was seen in her eyes was the blood of Miracle, escaping her head and
her floor, her head completely damaged. As was her heart.
She had no voice to scream her lungs out, nor the strength left in her to cry what
left of her.
What she witnessed was gory, disgusting, frightening and all right suffering.
When her mother with Miracle, her blood covered fist collided with her face.
That night she woke up, her face bruised, and Miracle's body still lying there.
That night she held the puppy, running her hands through her soft fur, and rubbing
cheek against her nose, wishing that she would lick her cheek like she always did.
chanted through her sobs how sorry she was, how she loved her so much.
That night she cried herself to sleep, still holding the puppy tightly.
That night was endless.
Rest In Peace Miracle.
You can be free and happy now, up in the clouds.
Lily will always love you.
-- Present Time --
She hoped her post would have made it onto the site.
She hoped than someone would hear her desperate call.
She shivered as she wrapped the blanket around her tightly, the thin material not
at all. Her mattress was lumpy and uncomfortable, and her room was pitch black. Her
didn't like the of sleeping with the curtains open, so she had to close her curtains
night before she went to bed.
The feeling of being surrounded by darkness, it felt as if you were being suffocated.
you never knew when it was going to end. She didn't like it. But it was something
have to live with.
People wish for many things. Like fame, or money, or getting a job they loved.
have a million wishes.
Lily Logan only wished for one thing.