Why don't you Love me Mum?-A Lil' story by Me Login to Kupika  or  Create a new account 
 

This diary entry is written by Star_B. ( View all entries )
 

Why don't you Love me Mum?-A Lil' story by MeCategory: (general)
Monday, 15 November 2010
02:24:37 AM (GMT)
Mkay, this story is in fact about Child Abuse
It was written by ME.

Now you may begin reading (;

Why Won't You Love Me, Mum?
Chapter 1

Blood

Dark, scarlet blood. 

She simply just watched it roll down her own cheek, the pain stinging her but it was
eased by a numb feeling she couldn't comprehend. Her hazel eyes red and puffy, her
throat
dry and sore and her skin pale and ghost like, in contrast to her blood that simply
continued to drip as if they were her tears. 

The cut on the left-side of her head, was deep but not deep enough to require
stitches,
her mother made sure of that. It was only deep enough to hurt and scar. 
Some scars were permanent such as the one on her shoulder blade, and others leaving
only
a faint mark that would be barely visible. This scar was no different to the rest. It
was
a deep cut from the top of hairline on the left side of her head and scarring until
it was
aligned with the top of her ear. 

She simply looked at herself in the mirror and then to her blood covered hands. 

An hour ago her mother had stumbled into the house, her words slurred and loud and
her
breath reeking of alcohol. Her face red and eyes full of anger. She had obediently
come
to her mothers call, like a puppy coming to its master. She listened to her words,
filling her with hurt. She let her grab her hair roughly and force her against the
wall.


She screamed and cried.
But not because of the physical pain her mother gave her.

Her mother always made sure to scar her, when she saw a scar heal on her own
daughters
body, she made sure to give her a new one. She used her kitchen knife while forcing
her
daughters head against the wall and slowing slicing her delicate skin. She simply
whimpered and her mothers words were soft but not in a soothing way. She always said
the
same thing, when she scarred her. “This will teach you to never mess with your
mother,”; her voice repeated in her head. Soft yet the tone cruel and sadistic. 

Her mother had passed out on the couch after that, and she had run into the
bathroom,
locking herself in. Though instead of cleaning the blood that dripped down on the
floor
or on her flower-printed dress, she simply stared at herself. 
She called her ugly and unworthy. 
She made her believe that. 

She was simply only an eight-year old girl. 


People said she was intelligent for her age.
Her mother said otherwise.
So she believed that as well.
She believed that if she really was smart, her mother would actually be proud and
stop
hurting her. 

She prepared their dinner for the night, her hands shaky as she tried to carry the
large
bowl of spaghetti in her small hands. She felt the heat of the house drown her, her
sweat
dripping on her new scar, making it sting slightly. Placing it on the table, she
grabbed
the plate that was her mothers and scooped five, big wooden spoonfuls onto it. 
She brought the plate over to her mothers room, where she laid on her bed, flipping
through channels on the television. Her expression bored, her eyes red and she had
just
woken up with a hangover. Placing the plate on the night stand next to her, she
looked at
her mother wearily.
Her mother turned around and looked at her with the look of hatred. “Leave the
room,“
she said hoarsely with a stern voice.

She nodded slightly and walked out the room, closing the door behind her. She sighed
and
walked back into the kitchen where the leftovers of spaghetti was.
She ate while searching through their computer, her homework being finished and her
chores done. Her spare time was spent on the computer. She liked the website called
'Six
Billion Secrets' reading what ran through peoples minds and problems they had was
something she could relate to.
She bit her lip, she always wanted to type her problem onto the website, hoping
someone
could save her. She could hear the noise of the television that came from her
mothers
room loud and clear. She looked back at the screen and shakily clicked 'Tell us your
secret'. 
Her small fingers hovered over the keys.
One by one she began to type slowly

My name is Lily Logan, I'm eight years old, I've never met my father and my mother
abuses
me, and all I keep wondering to myself, every night is....

Why won't you love me mum?




This one is a bit more...brutal... So be prepared.

Why Won't You Love Me, Mum?
Chapter 2




Why Won't you Love me Mum?

There was time where she was happy one time in her life.

She looked out her window that night, the stars shining brightly out there. The night
was
beautiful, but at times it was a nightmare, when her mother would walk in that is.
But she
was in a deep slumber, where you would need a huge drum set to wake her up. 
Her breaths were quiet and short. She surrounded herself by her thin blanket. 
Trying to know what a mothers love felt like was complicated. 
But she knew what love felt like. 
She loved a little puppy dog when she was five, unknown to her mother of course. The
puppy was a stray, she found her on her way home from school. The puppy had come to
her,
and she had given her half her sandwich. She was a golden retriever, her fur a light
brown colour, and she had fur soft like cotton. She called her Miracle, something
she
always wished for.

Miracle stayed hidden in her room, under her bed or her blankets. Miracle was such a
small puppy and could be easily be mistaken for one of her stuff toys. Lily loved
her
with all her little heart could muster. She'd sneak half of her food in her into her
pockets or wrap them in tissues to give to her. Though she couldn't hide Miracle
forever...

- - 3 years ago - -
Her giggles were only heard within her room, as she crawled around the floor. Hearing
the
sounds of  light footsteps behind her, she turned brightly to see the small pup
behind
her. Her tail wagging happily and her tongue sticking out as she looked at her owner
with
her big brown eyes.
She jumped on her owner playfully, licking her cheeks and staying close to her.
Their
affection and admiration for each other was strong. 
Miracle chased her around her room, Lily's giggles getting alittle louder each time.
Her
occasional squeal and Miracle's occasional yapping. In truth Lily always loved this
feeling.
Happiness.

She loved Miracle more than anything. She loved the warm feeling that flowed around
her
stomach, she loved that she couldn't stop smiling or giggling, she may be young and
innocent but she was smart enough to know what these feelings were. It was simply
puppy
love. But it was as strong as anything, Lily knew that it was and Miracle loved her,
she
may be a dog, but you could see in her eyes that she loved her back, just as much. 
But the happiness was silenced.
Lily could feel the gasp escaping her mouth, and Miracle stared at her curiously.
Lily
could hear the jangling of keys and the turning of the knob downstairs. As fast as
she
could motioned the dog to go under her bed, who obeyed. She could feel the thumping
of
her heart pound against her chest, as she heard the squeak of the front door.

Thump, thump.

She heard heavy footsteps, the pace uneven. Her groaning was loud, and the sound of
glass
shattering on  the floor. She was drunk, even worse.

Thump, thump.

She can feel the dizziness slowly overcoming on her, her mothers screams were
running
into her ears, and everything felt as if it were going faster. Her footsteps
becoming
louder and louder, but all she heard was her heart pounding against her chest, as if
it
were about to break her chest. She could hear Miracle's quiet whimpers only faintly.
Her
head kept telling her to get out of the room, but she it was if she was nailed to
the
floor.

Thump, thump. 

Then there was the pounding on her door, the screams and threats being spat at. She
could
see the rusty hinges move, she prayed that they wouldn't break. She could feel sweat
slowly rolling down her forehead. She winced as the slow turning of the doorknob
screeched in her ears. She knew then, she was too late. 

"Pest!" her voice screeched as her mothers, opened the door with such force, "what
are
you doing here? Why is your room a mess?" 
Her voice had disappeared the moment she saw the hot burning fire in her mothers
eyes.
She snarled at her and walked towards her. Grabbing her by her neck, and letting her
grip
tighten slowly. 

"I asked you a question, pest," she spat at her, her small hands grasped her larger
one,
as she winced at how tight her mother gripped her. Her gasps for breath only made
her
mother hiss at her. 

"Not talking?" she growled, she shook her. Lily suddenly felt the dizziness overcome
her.
Her mother continued to shake her, and keep her grip around her neck.

"Please," she gasped," please....st...stop," her head started to pound and the rest
of
her body was numb. She felt as if she were going to vomit.

"What was that?" she stopped shaking her, her breath reeking, only making it harder
to
breathe. She stayed silent, whatever she said was wrong.
Before she knew it, she felt her fragile body being slammed against the wall. She
heard
the crack of her shoulder blades, her mouth gaped open, having to scream at the pain,
but
no sound would escape her mouth.
She knew her mother was about to beat her, but her fist had stop mid-way before she
screamed and released her death grip on her. Lily had landed a heap on the floor,
her
body completely numb and her sight hazy. 
That's when she saw what her mother had gripped, her heart coming to a stop. She
watched
her hand strangle Miracles neck. She could hear her yelping loud and clear, and her
mothers angry screaming.

"Damn mutt!" she screamed, as she held the dog on the floor, her whimpers and yelps,
tearing Lily's heart. She watched her mother bang her fist down on Miracle's
repeatedly.
The whimpering and yelping no longer escaping the dogs mouth. All was heard was her
mothers scream and the pounding of her fist hitting the, poor lifeless puppy. 

All that was seen in her eyes was the blood of Miracle, escaping her head and
staining
her floor, her head completely damaged. As was her heart. 
She had no voice to scream her lungs out, nor the strength left in her to cry what
was
left of her. 
What she witnessed was gory, disgusting, frightening and all right suffering. 
When her mother with Miracle, her blood covered fist collided with her face. 
That night she woke up, her face bruised, and Miracle's body still lying there. 
That night she held the puppy, running her hands through her soft fur, and rubbing
her
cheek against her nose, wishing that she would lick her cheek like she always did. 
She
chanted through her sobs how sorry she was, how she loved her so much. 
That night she cried herself to sleep, still holding the puppy tightly. 
That night was endless.

Rest In Peace Miracle.
You can be free and happy now, up in the clouds.
Just remember...
Lily will always love you.  

-- Present Time -- 
She hoped her post would have made it onto the site.
She hoped than someone would hear her desperate call.
She shivered as she wrapped the blanket around her tightly, the thin material not
helping
at all. Her mattress was lumpy and uncomfortable, and her room was pitch black. Her
mother
didn't like the of sleeping with the curtains open, so she had to close her curtains
every
night before she went to bed. 
The feeling of being surrounded by darkness, it felt as if you were being suffocated.
And
you never knew when it was going to end. She didn't like it. But it was something
she'd
have to live with. 
People wish for many things. Like fame, or money, or getting a job they loved.
People
have a million wishes.
Lily Logan only wished for one thing.

A miracle.

Comments 
luciieewattpad says:   20 November 2010   663301  
hey bitch! stop stealing my friends story please!
possessed_teddyy says:   21 November 2010   262110  
u r 1 true b~~~~! u f'n steeler\
jen_nontalented_96 says:   23 November 2010   930845  
HEY GET YOUR OWN STORY! i dont know why you're still on here you're
suppose to be kicked out!! nobody likes stealers! you aren't who you
say you are! AND FRANKLY YOU'RE STILL PISSING ME OFF!! GET RID OF THIS
CAUSE ITS NOT YOURS!! SO PLEASE STOP COPYING ME OR I WILL HAVE TO
RESORT TO FURTHER AND MORE DANGEROUS ISSUES!! >
SupportJenfclub says:   23 November 2010   161257  
Hiya, u know wat???? if u don't rember me i'm the seriously anoyed
person whos not in a good mood to start with today who had to get an
account on this just because some little brat (if u didn't realise is
you) IS STEALING MY BEST FRIENDS STORY!!!  sooooooooooooooo once again
STOP, do u not understand the word BANNED???  i have a definition if u
want; to prohibit, forbid, or bar. so in other words, STOP STEALING MY
FRIENDS STORY, LEAVE THIS WEBSITE and in conclusion F**** OFF!!!!!!!!
luciieewattpad says:   23 November 2010   632674  
hello Star_B! GET THE FUCK OFF THIS WEBSITE OR AT LEAST DELETE THIS
STORY FROM EVERYEHRE YOU POSTED IT YOU FUCKED UP BITCH! IT ISNT YOURS!
GET IT THE FUCK OFF HERE YOU MOTHER FUCKER
SupportJenfclub says:   23 November 2010   191991  
oh and i 4got, how DARE u try and pass this off as ur own?????? do u
seriously have no moral ethics????
SupportJenfclub says:   23 November 2010   975255  
Lucciies getting scary Star_B, id listen to her. u dont know wat
she's like
jen_nontalented_96 says:   23 November 2010   835619  
You know what, you can fucking have it, im getting rid of my wattpad
account, you'll never know the ending bitch. Have fun trying to end
it! Hope you fail miserably!
NightMareChild says:   24 November 2010   102838  
Do you have no imagination? THINK OF YOUR OWN STORY OR LEAVE THE SITE
jen_nontalented_96 says :   24 November 2010   897018  
Since i don't have my wattpad account anymore, and I don't care if I
get kicked out of this club or website 

I would just like you say, you are a stupid whore, who has no life,
you're lazy and don't bother to right a story of your own because you
are a stupid lazy bitch, who I hate with all my soul. You can't report
me for this because you stole MY story, mother fucker. I have all
rights to sue and report your stupid ass, I also have the right to be
rude and spit swear words at you. Did you really think I wouldnt find
out? Did you really think you would get away with this? Are you this
fucking stupid!? You simply copied MY story, hell you even used the
same title, and you just posted it on a different site! You have no
imagination nor the respect for other writers! You're a stupid lazy,
stealing whore of a bitch! Fuck you, fuck you, fuck you! Karma is a
fucking bitch aint it!? Just like you! By the way I hate you! I want
my friends to rip your head off and let you burn! Maybe then I'll show
a real smile! I hope you die lonely and soon. Stealer! Stealer! I may
be taking this too far, but you know what I don't fucking care! I know
I sound like a fucking maniac, but if you stay on this sight any
longer I swear I will cut your throat open!! 

With complete and utter hate.
Jen.

 
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