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This diary entry is written by CoconutSoldier. ( View all entries )
 

10 REASONS WHY GAY MARRIAGE IS WRONGCategory: GLBT
Sunday, 8 November 2009
11:00:44 PM (GMT)
10 REASONS WHY GAY MARRIAGE IS WRONG 


1. Being gay is not natural. Real Americans always reject unnatural things like
eyeglasses, polyester, and air conditioning.

2. Gay marriage will encourage people to be gay, in the same way that hanging around
tall people will make you tall.

3. Gay marriage will change the foundation of society; we could never adapt to new
social norms. Just like we haven't adapted to cars, the service-sector economy, or
longer life spans.

4. Straight marriage has been around a long time and hasn't changed at all; women are
still property, blacks still can't marry whites, and divorce is still illegal.

5. Straight marriage will be less meaningful if gay marriage were allowed; the
sanctity of Brittany Spears' 55-hour just-for-fun marriage would be destroyed.

6. Straight marriages are valid because they produce children. Gay couples, infertile
couples, and old people shouldn't be allowed to marry because our orphanages aren't
full yet, and the world needs more children.

7. Obviously gay parents will raise gay children, since straight parents only raise
straight children.

8. Gay marriage is not supported by religion. In a theocracy like ours, the values of
one religion are imposed on the entire country. That's why we have only one religion
in America.

9. Children can never succeed without a male and a female role model at home. That's
why we as a society expressly forbid single parents to raise children.

10. Legalizing gay marriage will open the door to all kinds of crazy behavior. People
may even wish to marry their pets because a dog has legal standing and can sign a
marriage contract.

Comments 
JackPower says:   8 November 2009   104880  
Sigh. I dont even want to tell you all the reasons that gay marriage
is wrong cause all you will do is nag me to death.
 
StringQuartets says:   8 November 2009   871079  
Holy shit, I rofled all the way through. This is genius.
 
Lyncheh says:   8 November 2009   630266  
They won't understand this. (;
 
Izzylovesthebeatles says:   8 November 2009   223839  
well i knew a staight couple they had kids and one of their boys is
gay and he is very kind and gay marrige is okay its not their fault
their attracted to their own gender.
 
StringQuartets says:   8 November 2009   960259  
No, no they hardly understand this at all. I think I may very
well just die. I'm loling so hard.
 
Dave12H says:   8 November 2009   247913  
I like this. quite clever and Very funny.
LadyInRed says:   8 November 2009   783002  
I almost went bisexual,and my parents are straight..
 
walkingtravesty says:   9 November 2009   175734  
This made my night.
 
Absolution says:   9 November 2009   755820  
HAHA so many reasons this made me laugh.

"hanging around tall people will make you tall"

haha, fucking gay haters, you're so silly.
 
‹hypnohsis› says:   9 November 2009   821212  
Divorce isn't illeagle and blacks can marry whites.
 
‹GirlTheHero› says:   9 November 2009   436143  
"Legalizing gay marriage will open the door to all kinds of crazy
behavior.
People may even wish to marry their pets because a dog has legal
standing and can sign a marriage contract."


BWAHAHAHAHAHA !!!! You have no idea about gay marriage dont you!!! XD
 
‹hypnohsis› says:   9 November 2009   379616  
One religon in america?your such a dumbass!Theres tons of
religons in america.
 
StringQuartets says:   9 November 2009   689160  
The people who take offense to this...have something seriously
wrong with them. It's a shame people can no longer understand sarcasm
u.u
 
‹goodfornothing› says:   9 November 2009   217251  
sarcastic diary entry is sarcastic.
I'd this out to the dumbasses, but I enjoy laughing at their stupidity




this diary wins. I think I love you a lot. gay marry me please?
 
CoconutSoldier says:   9 November 2009   724798  
I'm glad there are some of you that understand the underlying humour
._.
 
‹EPIDEMIC› says:   9 November 2009   483760  
no. 4 is just RACIST.
 
‹(♥♫TsuruPettan♫♥);› says:   9 November 2009   291936  
I know this is all... stupidly faked sarcasm, but there was no point
in making it, because people find it offensive.
Even joking in a humurous way, despite as stupid as it was, it's
still offensive. Realize that, okay.
And by the way, Straight parents don't make straight children.
What kind of stereotype is that? My mom and dady are straight but my
sister ended up being bisexual- so your proof is zero. :3
Do more research.
Staight parents are just more likely not going to accepted it.
'Specially Ultra-Religion-catholic/christian parents. 
Gay parents are simply more accepting. Which we should all be. 

If you actually put thought into this, despite as jokeful as it was,
you'd know there are no reasons why gay marriage can't be
done.
We seem to only have one life, let them enjoy it because you
wouldn't want some one else destroy your happiness; now would you?
 
‹*Starry*Eyed*Bitch*› says:   9 November 2009   364629  
This is sickening, people have a right to love who they love. And if
they're gay it's natural because it's them!

And actually, it's not bad that they don't give birth, they can adopt
or foster, that would mean a child gets a home and a loving family,
and there's actually to much of a population on earth.

If it makes them happy, they should be allowed to be happy. I was
bisexual before, I'm straight now but I've always had a respect for
bisexuals, gays and lesbians because they're brave and honest to
themselves and everyone around them.
 
StringQuartets says:   9 November 2009   327389  
 These responses, make me want to cry. And I will cry, as soon
as i stop loling. 

People, this girl is all for homosexual relationships. Realize that,
and sometimes, people have to be 'offensive' in order to get
the point across.

Lols, do more thinking.
 
zoeeee says:   9 November 2009   298327  
holy shit as long as they're happy and love eachother who cares???
 
zoeeee says:   9 November 2009   580210  
"hanging around tall ppl will make u tall"? wtf
 
Lyncheh says:   9 November 2009   778384  
@zoeeee 
@zoeeee 
@Sexy_Bi 
@AudioSurf 
@AielleO_e 
@Imthegirlinthebackwithscars 
@prinnsesskitty8 
@Absolution 

THE WHOLE POINT OF THE DIARY IS THAT THE PERSON WHO WROTE THIS LIST IS
IN SUPPORT OF GAY MARRIAGE AND IS USING SARCASM TO SHOW HOW SILLY IT
IS TO NOT SUPPORT GAY MARRIAGE. AN EXAMPLE OF THIS SARCASM WOULD BE
WHEN IT SAYS, 

2. Gay marriage will encourage people to be gay, in the same way that
hanging around tall people will make you tall.

OBVIOUSLY HANGING AROUND TALL PEOPLE DOESN'T MAKE YOU TALL, SO ONE CAN
DEDUCE THAT THE WRITER IS SAYING THAT THE IDEA THAT GAY MARRIAGE WILL
MAKE PEOPLE GAY IS SILLY AND IT DOESN'T HAPPEN.

Now the love of shit go back to school and learn some basic
comprehension skills, kids. 
 
StringQuartets says:   9 November 2009   970242  
 I'm sorry, but that just made my day. @Lyncheh 
 
Sanyu says:   9 November 2009   152841  
"The writer" being unknown, btw, kids. It's been circulating for a
time :P
 
zoeeee says:   9 November 2009   932787  
oh. i'm sry coconutsoldier!!!! hahahahahaha
 
Awesomess says:   9 November 2009   159719  
im jst comment ing you because im a caring prson so you be one to and
plz comment me twooz. IM SO LONELY
COMMENT PLZ
 
‹goodfornothing› says:   9 November 2009   642105  
@StringQuartets 
kids these days, right. D; 
 
Kingroxas says:   10 November 2009   686307  
Satire is the best medicine.
 
Oroborus21 says:   10 November 2009   815800  
this is actually pretty old...i think i saw it like a year ago going
around
 
‹Maii› says:   10 November 2009   640313  
....I find this offensive
 
Lyncheh says:   10 November 2009   342612  
 
‹ғяєακazoid› says:   10 November 2009   561179  
I love this. It's absolutely hilarious. And all those people who
don't get it are rather saddening, yet still hilarious also. C:
-clapclapclap-

[ oh and by the way, i have plenty of gay friends who would agree in
the hilarity of this. C: ]
 
‹DasAtem› says:   10 November 2009   766354  
I love how so many people just don't get it.
They're taking it literally.

This is so smart.
Very clever. (:
 
‹SmileOnFire› says:   10 November 2009   491934  
Indeed.
Its a little troubling how so many people think this is serious >.>

my favourite was 
"Obviously gay parents will raise gay children, since straight parents
only raise
straight children."
 
‹Jinx Ellise› says:   11 November 2009   658234  
LOLERS that was good,
but i'm still not a supporter ;T

but nice for a laugh, HA HA gays HA HA.
 
alocacoc says:   11 November 2009   564819  
When I first posted this about a year ago, none of my friends
realized it was sarcasm, and they found it offensive. Idiots.
 
Insaniity says:   11 November 2009   252870  
I eat babies.


Oh satire, how I love thee. (:
 
zoeeee says :   11 November 2009   851853  
weell... i just skimmed thru it, and i thought she was serious.....
sry for bein a dumbass
 

 
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