I figured I'd let out all the problems in my life. Login to Kupika  or  Create a new account 

This diary entry is written by Meige. ( View all entries )
Previous entry: How I've Been in category (general)

I figured I'd let out all the problems in my life.Category: (general)
Sunday, 29 June 2008
11:35:59 AM (GMT)
My dad used to molest me and stuff (and stuff being other things I don't want to
talk about) He molested my older brother and I'm scared he molests my little brother,
but there"s no way for me to tell because he keeps me locked up in my room 24/7 just
in case I decide to run away again. Oh yeah, I ran away for a couple months, the cops
brought me back, he hates cops and was so pissed it was scary. So he sent me to an
asylum for a while, because he has enough money to keep me heavily medicated for the
rest of my life in an asylum and would if it weren't for the fact that that would
seem suspicious. I can't use the phones and the only reason I'm every on the internet
is because I bribed a maid into getting me one. Not only that I haven't talked to my
cousin or friends or brothers for that matter in forever.
Last edited: 29 June 2008

‹SecretsInTheShadows› says:   29 June 2008   428517  
omg thats so sad that you have to deal with that  it makes me want
to cry im like crying right now hope you can get out of that as fast
as possible *cries*
Meige says:   29 June 2008   175518  
I've thought about running away again, but I don't know how I'd get
away again
‹SecretsInTheShadows› says:   29 June 2008   853961  
well do you have a frien thats trustworthy and there parents will
help you can go to them 
‹SecretsInTheShadows› says:   29 June 2008   814198  
Meige says:   29 June 2008   379396  
Yea, but getting out the house is the problem. I'd have plenty of
places to go.
‹SecretsInTheShadows› says:   29 June 2008   956432  
oh when does your dad go to work you can try then
Meige says:   29 June 2008   242656  
he's a writer so he's pretty much always home
‹SecretsInTheShadows› says:   29 June 2008   627461  
oh hold on ill send you a message
ororon_master_of_evil says:   29 June 2008   231335  
are you ashamed of me nicki??
punk_kid_oooo says:   29 June 2008   539146  
i'm sending you a message ok??
Meige says:   29 June 2008   935863  
No, why would you ever think that??

and K
‹♥ Simply Susan ♥› says:   29 June 2008   132891  
i'm sorry about all that...i'm here if you ever need someone to talk
‹RachelLovesYOU› says:   29 September 2008   886792  
aww i feel sad now awww  im here if you wanna chat or hug
‹thatswhathesaid› says:   30 September 2008   581411  
What about school?
Meige says:   30 September 2008   615197  
Ks ^_^
And I used to go to boaring schools mostly, but now I dropped how. I
live with my grandma in the country so I figure what's the use of
school at this point.
‹AlexAttached<3› writes:   8 October 2008   884473  
My fucking god. Sure, a fair world we live in. As if, dude.
I... don't know what to say. Probably because I'm aware of how you
must feel, I've been there, gone through pretty similar stuff, ad it
was hard to talk about. Nothing ever changed how it felt, ho
frightening it looked. Nothing could make smile, I began to lose hope,
to lose confidence in myself, to seek for loneliness and self-harm as
the only way out... I also ran away, I threatened to murder people, I
went on a shooting spree, I drank until I passed away all the time...
It was horrible.
And, I want to make you feel better, because your father (who
shouldn't be called that, by all means) has no right to do such. And,
hell, I'm opening up here because I've never really met anyone who
went through problems alike. Worst fact is, you're going through it
at the moment.
And I have no clue on what I should say, because I know words don't do
a thing. They never did...
I can only wish you luck, ad strength. Please, don't give up.
Everything may seem meaningless and painful, but think this way: that
ugly world you're currently living in doesn't deserve you. 
Trusting others, yes, a hard task indeed. I had a difficult time
learning to let others know me, learning to trust, allowing them to be
around me... ^^;;
Gahhh... I could just kidnap you, 
but then we'd all get in bigger problems.

I feel like composing something, anything for you. This reminded me of
things, I'm now currently stressed, and it's frustrating.. ¬¬' Music
shall guide me, then.
My guitar says she's sorry, and that she'll do her best on creating a
song, a melody, whatever it takes, to cheer you up.
<3 I need to be sure you'll be alright.
I always said I was, and then I lied. And true friends did worry, some
people did care, when all I did was send them away. Like I couldn't
have them around. It hurt to know that, because I wasn't alright, and
therefore, they weren't either.

Hope you're holding on', dude. I really hope you'll be okay in the
Psshh, what end. Life goes on forever, just don't lose the
little reasons that make you smile, or willing to get off your bed and
face the day, every morning.
If there aren't any.... :D
Well, I can try my best to find one for you, dear.

*gives you a hug from behind, 'cuz they carry more emotion and you
wouldn't be able to see my eyes tearing their orbs apart. this made me
a little-too-much sensitive*


[...You're al 
‹AlexAttached<3› says:   8 October 2008   693294  
* [...You're alright, right...? Hangin' in there, right? Dude, don't
fucking make shoot your dad. I haven't hit eighteen, so I could pretty
much kill someone and plead insanity at the court. D:]

I write too much;
then again, this really stroke me, hard, on both heart and mind. :S
Meige says :   8 October 2008   636552  
Things are getting better, I talked to my grandma and she decided
she'd take me and so I live with her. I used to get alot of letters
from my dad, but I never reply and I think he's given up sending them
to me so he sends them to my little brother. Ever since I left I think
I feel better and less boxed in. It's way deep in the country, a bunch
of acres of land so I could do whatever I wanted for year somewhere
out in the woods and no one would notice I bet. It's sort of funny
everyone's dedicated themselves to this constant effort to help me not
hate my dad but they don't really get it. I'm sort of in this stage
where it's like "am I doing what I do because of what happened or do I
do it because it's me/ something I like" like little things like
organizing my food and nervous gestures I make.


Next entry: Please Help Me in category (general)
Related Entries
‹DasAtem›: Oooohohoh. Little blackbook.
Extensions: Secrets...
Nerd: My stupid Dang life
omg_doggies: I HATE LIFE
‹Moi→Nerd is in Despair›: Secrets plz.

About Kupika    Contact    FAQs    Terms of Service    Privacy Policy    Online Safety
Copyright © 2005-2012