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This diary entry is written by YoukaiYumeFan. ( View all entries )
 
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The weeping AngelCategory: Depression
Thursday, 5 July 2007
07:00:05 PM (GMT)
Winter rain had never intrigued him much. Although, he was not that big a fan of
rain, he found summer rain to be more acceptable. He remembered the stories that his
mother used to tell him as she sat in a chair, twirling a lock of his silver hair
around her soft, white, petite fingers which branched from an equally soft looking
fair hand. He had used to tell her how he hated the rain; how just mere raining made
him want to cry. His mother after patiently listening to his thoughts would then
explain to him in her soft soothing voice why it was so. She used to say that in
summer when it rained, it meant that the angels were crying from their heavenly
homes. She had explained to him that the very rain that washed away the tress and
soaked them and other creatures to the skin were the tears of the angels who were
howling from the heavens. However, when it rained in winter, it meant that the angels
were weeping and slow fat tears leaked from their eyes and dropped to the vast world
below. He would then ask her, annoyed, about the difference between crying and
weeping. To which, she would smile her sad smile and say ‘You’ll know one day, my
son.’

Inuyasha sat in the Goshinboku high up on his favorite branch, Tetsusaiga resting
lightly against his hips. His adorable furry dog ears were lying flat against his
hair, an expression which meant that he was either sorry or depressed. Although, this
day it was the latter, but before he could plunge into the depths of why he was
feeling so, his little doggy ears perked up and he sniffed cautiously. It was the
monk. Another reason why he had hated the rain was because it damaged his sense of
smell and made him feel weak and vulnerable. The proud half demon although sure that
it was the perverted monk he had smelled, looked down from his high perch just to
make clear all doubts that he was indeed correct. Sure enough, there was Miroku
sitting against the tree, carrying one of the “umbre-ellas” from Kagome’s time
and a strange contraption that apparently Kagome had ‘gifted’ him. Inuyasha
watched curiously as Miroku pressed some buttons and then after some time, music
flared through the device. He knew that below, except Miroku, no one could hear the
song but as a half demon with his ‘superior hearing abilities’, he was able to
listen quite comfortably to the song that was playing below.

Just thinking about the monk made him think about the slayer. It had been three
months since Naraku had been defeated. The battle brought a grim smile to his face.
It had taken arrows of both Kagome and Kikyou, his wind scar and Sesshoumaru’s
attack from Tenseiga to finish Naraku once and for all. Unfortunately, due to
Sesshoumaru’s attack, Kikyou’s souls flew from her body and went to the graves of
their respective owners. Only one shining white piece remained which escaped into
Kagome, knocking the breath out of her. As he cradled the limp Kagome in his arms, he
watched, as his old love was carried by the wind to the heavens where she belonged.
After a bargain with Kagome, Sesshoumaru revived Kohaku and left them without a word
or backward glance, flexing his left arm which had been returned to him.

It had been three months and still nothing occurred. Inuyasha had thought that after
defeating Naraku, the monk and the slayer would be together. However, no such thing
happened. Sango spent most of her time training Shippou and Kohaku. Her once radiant
face was now grim and the only time she smiled was after Shippou or Kohaku mastered a
particularly difficult technique. Miroku now without his black hole, somehow to the
astonishment of many, became less perverted. He agreed to remain in Kaede’s village
as a monk to preach religion. This statement once upon a happier time would have made
Inuyasha snort in disbelief. But now, somehow he didn’t find it that hard to
believe. Miroku now looked more serious, his face had hardened and there were firm
lines etched on his face. He looked older than ever and could hardly be recognized as
the same lecherous teen who asked every beautiful woman to bear his child.

Shippou was the only one who hadn’t changed much. He developed a wonderful
friendship with Kohaku and he became more determined. He even grew up a bit and
(although Inuyasha would never admit it) he looked quite a handsome young demon now.
He even seemed to be developing feelings for Sesshoumaru’s ward, Rin. The thought
made Inuyasha frown for he could quite clearly remember how the wretched girl’s
whole face had lighted up, her large brown eyes shining when Kohaku had thanked her
and Sesshoumaru for reviving him. Not wanting to think about Shippou, Inuyasha’s
thoughts changed their direction and landed on the one person he didn’t want to
think about.

Kagome.

Rin’s innocent large brown eyes reminded him of another girl’s eyes who was in a
similar predicament. Kagome was the one who had changed the most out of all of them.
She was no longer the naïve 15 year old girl who needed someone to protect her. With
her archery skills mastered to almost perfection, she was (now with Kikyou being
dead), the most powerful priestess around. Her appearance had also somewhat changed
and so had her apparel. No longer did she wear that flimsy green skirt and white top.
Whenever she came to visit them in the Feudal Era, she would wear lovely kimonos and
her hair would be set up perfectly. What disturbed him most was that the ‘new’
Kagome apparently liked applying ‘make up’. Her naturally pink lips were usually
painted in ruby red or sometimes even shimmering pinks and mauves. Her beautiful eyes
were mostly outlined with dark lines making her look quite a lot like the deceased
Kagura. Inuyasha hated her new look and even told her so which earned him few hits
with Hiraikotsu, some ‘wise’ words from the monk and few SITS. But he had been
truthful. He longed to see the OLD Kagome, who he felt, was buried somewhere deep
under the false façade of the NEW Kagome.

He learnt that there was no such thing as an UNselfish wish. They had used the jewel
to keep the well open so that Kagome could continue living her double life. He
hadn’t wished for her to leave her family forever and obviously, he never wanted
her to leave HIM, so he took the jewel from her hand and wished for it. He had been
rewarded with a warm hug and a kiss on his cheek. The memory still made him smile and
reminded him how close she had been to his lips when she had whispered ‘Thank you,
Inuyasha.’

The first month, she came every day with plenty of gifts for others and ramen for
him. He wondered where her sudden money came from but he knew better than to ask. She
would think he was being ungrateful. As the second month progressed, the visits
shortened and were also occasional. He used to go to see her everyday but after one
week of being unsuccessful in meeting her, he gave up.

Flashback

Inuyasha jumped into Kagome’s room and looked around for his raven-haired angel.
Unable to find her, he bounded down the stairs and entered the dining room where the
rest of the family was seated.

Kagome was not there.

Mrs. Higurashi smiled a small sad smile and said ‘Ah, Inuyasha, you’re here.’

Inuyasha refrained from rolling his eyes and instead looked around and said
‘Where’s Kagome?’

With the same sickeningly pitiful smile, Mrs. Higurashi replied ‘Kagome’s ah …
um … hanging out with her friends!’

At this, Souta had actually snorted. His mother shot him a dirty look but Souta
grinned darkly and said ‘You mean Houjo’. ‘Or homo as I like to think of him’
he added in an undertone.

Inuyasha was at a loss for words. She was with HOBO? But hadn’t she sworn that she
had no feelings for him? That he only had a stupid childish ‘crush’ on her?

So, he settled for saying lamely ‘Um…ohk then, bye.’

Then he looked at Souta and smirked at him ‘Thanks a lot kid.’

Souta smiled and waved it off with an ‘Anything for you, Brother Inuyasha.’

He never went to see Kagome after that again.

End Flashback

He did not know when but somehow, he realized that he was actually listening to
Miroku’s song quite intently. As the lyrics poured out, he understood how much they
resembled him and his problems. It was as if the song had been written specifically
for him or something.

You were my eyes when I couldn't see,

You were my air when I couldn't breathe,

It was true. He remembered how Kagome had helped him during his human nights and even
during his demon ‘times’.

But you always knew what you meant to me,

Kagome knew how much she meant to him. She just HAD to. Hadn’t they shared so much
together? Hadn’t he risked his life to save her innumerable times? HADN’T SHE
SAID THAT SHE LOVED HIM? But still, she left him to go for that HOUJO guy.

You were my strength when I was down,

And you made me humble when I wouldn't bow,

She had guided him through his difficult times with a bright smile and never even
complained once about it. When he had been too proud, she made him humble. She never
let him become conceited. He remembered her SITS all too well.

Where were you when I was alright?

Tell me, did you know I was alright?

You, left me thinking I'd be alright,

Won’t you come back to me?

Did she think he would be alright without her? Did she even THINK about HIM even
ONCE? Wasn’t she ever going to return to him? To return his love?

It's crazy but I’m falling apart,

It’s crazy how your leaving me scarred,

It's crazy; hope you’re feeling my pain,

It's crazy girl wherever you are,

You stole my heart

He knew he was falling apart. He didn’t need Sango and Shippou’s sympathetic
glances to know that. She had stolen his heart and left him empty with a void. He
hoped bitterly that she felt the same pain that he was feeling now. Then he realized
how selfish he had sounded. These feelings were crazy. The WHOLE SITUATION was
crazy.

(Stolen)

Just like a moment...

(Stolen)

You never owned it

(Stolen)

You took away my heart

She had stolen his heart when he had been unaware. She had no right to do so. SHE
never owned HIS heart. She took away his heart. But she didn’t give him hers in
return.

It's the same sad story that we all know,

How lovers make mistakes watch it all blow,

Now I don't wanna be the one to let it all go... nooooooooo

It was almost the same as the situation with Kikyou. Only then he felt that Kikyou
had killed him. At this moment, he wouldn’t have minded if Kagome came and killed
him. If would be better than this. SHE was betraying HIM with another MAN.

It's crazy but I’m falling apart,

It's crazy how your leaving me scarred,

It's crazy girl wherever you are,

You stole my heart

It's crazy but I'm going insane,

Feeling lost confused and ashamed,

It's crazy; hope you’re feeling my pain,

You stole my heart

(Stolen)

Just like a moment...

(Stolen)

You never owned it,

(Stolen)

You took away my heart

The song ended and Inuyasha sighed. Without his notice, a tear dropped down his
cheek. I love this song.

IN KAGOME’s TIME

Kagome stretched and let out a long sigh. It had been a tiring day. Her life had
suddenly taken a lot of turns and most of them were good for her. She had returned to
her time and met Houjo. Again. She heard from her other friends that he had changed.
But she had never expected THIS. Houjo had changed. And he had changed BIG TIME. The
pale skinned brown haired boy was no more. In front of her today was a 19 year old
man. He had definitely worked out. He was wearing a white shirt with which was quite
open at the throat. He had admirable abs and he was completely hairless except the
part which was covered with a very light dusting of silky brown hairs. His brown hair
had grown quite long, well past his ears. He had applied few blondish brown streaks
in them. And to complete this vision of perfection he was carrying a bouquet of red
roses. And he was smirking at her. Not smiling. But smirking. His voice had grown
more masculine. He just said two words which had her swooning. ‘Hey Kagome’

That was all it took. They had been dating for a month and half and she knew that he
would propose to her any day now. She realized that her feelings for Inuyasha were
just a childish school girl crush. She loved Houjo. She really did. But she
couldn’t stop thinking about Inuyasha.

To get rid of the headache, she turned on the radio. They played a song she had never
heard before. But as the lyrics poured over her, her heart sunk. She forced a scowl
to mar her pretty face and turned it off.

Her mother’s head popped in her bedroom, ‘Why did you turn it off, honey? The
song is pretty nice. I have never heard it before.’

‘I don’t like it mama.’ I hate this song.

Souta was passing by and he snorted. Mrs. Higurashi had an odd sense of déjà vu.

The teen shoved his hands into his pockets and said evilly ‘Because it makes her
feel guilty.’

As Kagome glared daggers at her brother who shrugged and left, Mrs. Higurashi
realized with a sinking heart. Inuyasha.

Kagome shooed her mother out of her room and locked the door. Souta’s words were
still ringing in her ears. ‘Because it makes her feel guilty.’ Guilty. Guilty.
Guilty. She WAS guilty. She betrayed Inuyasha. She had betrayed INUYASHA! The very
Inuyasha she used to claim to love. The very Inuyasha whom she longed to hold in her
arms. The very Inuyasha who had protected her. The VERY Inuyasha who had also HURT
her. She stood near her window and took out a cigarette. It was the last one in the
packet. Her mother didn’t know a LOT of things about her. But as she was lighting
it, somehow, she got startled and she dropped it.

DAMN. She cursed.

But as she looked out onto the silvery moonlight, she swore she could hear someone
singing.

Where were you when I was alright?

Tell me, did you know I was alright?

You, left me thinking I'd be alright,

Won’t you come back to me?

It's crazy but I’m falling apart,

It's crazy how your leaving me scarred,

It's crazy girl wherever you are,

You stole, my heart

It's crazy but I'm going insane,

Feeling lost, confused and ashamed,

It's crazy, hope you’re feeling my pain,

You stole, MY heart.

But she shrugged it off. She was imagining things. I hate that song.

500 years back in the past, the half demon Inuyasha jumped from his high perch in the
tree. As, he walked away, he could hear Shippou’s voice calling him. Not wanting to
let anyone see that he was crying, he darted deep into the forest.

Shippou was just going to go after Inuyasha when someone caught his arm. It was
Kaede. She shook her head. Across from her stood Sango. He saw that she had the same
expression.

‘But Kaede …. Sango …. he was CRYING. INUYASHA was CRYING.’

None of them looked too surprised at this news. Shippou’s voice caught in this
throat. But….

Kaede smiled a small smile which was barely visible. She whispered softly, ‘He
wasn’t crying Shippou, he was mourning. He was weeping.’

Shippou could only nod dumbly. He whimpered and threw himself at Kaede and started
howling. A small tear escaped Kaede. As he looked at Sango, he saw that her eyes were
glistening with unshed tears. Shippou hung onto Kaede and cried…………

But if he had not been crying he would have seen a lone figure standing in the
distance. His silver hair played about in the wind, his head shining in the
shimmering moonlight. He looked almost ethereal, as if he wasn’t alive or
something. But then a small movement showed that he was indeed alive. A small tear
fell from his eye continued its descent over his cheek and splashed onto his clawed
foot. He understood what his mother had meant.

‘You’ll know one day, my son.’

Oh, he knew for sure now.

He was after all ……. The weeping angel.

Comments 
jay4life says:   5 July 2007   483846  
that-was-so-true-and-you-really-have-a-future-in-writing-great-storie
s-did-anyone-tell-u-that-before.Because-all-your-stories-are-Hot!!!!!!
YoukaiYumeFan says :   5 July 2007   181887  
thanks Te He!~

 
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