- Sorry to anyone this might offend, but it's a true story, and i doubt
anyone actually reads these things anyway-

Person 1 (who will remain unnamed for their sake): Everyone's a lesbian.
Me: ...
P1: I mean, EVERYONE is a lesbian, and not even the good type of lesbian?
Me: ... i didn't realise there was a bad type of lesbian.
P1: Well, course there is. I mean there's the type who like girls and the type who
like boys and the type who swing both ways.
Me: I'm pretty sure the ones who like boys are called 'straight'.
P1: So if i liked a guy i'd be straight?
Me: No, you'd be gay.
P1: But gay is the same as lesbian.
Me: That's 'cause you're a dude. Girls who like boys are straight.
P1: So i should like girls then?
Me: If you're straight then yes. Tell me, what do you mean by 'the good type of
lesbian'?
P1: I mean the ones who where tight leather and carry whips and fasten you to the bed
with furry handcuffs and then...
Me: You mean prostitutes?
P1: Yeah that's the one.
Me: They're not lesbians.
P1: SHIT. So what are they?
Me: Whores.
P1: OH that's alright then. 'Prostitutes' make them sound so dirty.
Me: *facepalm*

As you can tell, that convo got NOWHERE.