Friday, 16 May 2008
01:59:56 AM (GMT)
Before you read this, if you didn't read my previous diary entry, you probably
should before you read this one. Sorry for any inconvenience! Hehe.
^^Some background music to be played while reading this entry. o_O
Okay, so I'm still confused, but I feel like such a big idiot right now. Why do I
keep telling my friend that I have something to tell her!? It's like, I'm not even
sure if I want to tell her yet. I told her, however, that I hadn't decided if I was
going to tell her or not, and she's like "It's that important, is it?" I feel like
she'd be really supportive, especially since she had a crush on a girl once. Still,
that was a bit different. The girl she liked was nice! Haha. The one I like [if I do
actually like her, which is a whole other matter] is a total bitch! Or, at least,
that's what she thinks, and that's what my other friends think. I still dunno if I
actually do really like this girl, which is part of the reason of why I want to wait
to tell my friend about this. In an email this is what I said to her:
"ok, so maybe one can't have too many obsessions. one can however have a very bad
obsession. which is like mine...okay, i take it back, i wouldn't call it an
obsession. i actually have no idea what to call it. = all i know is, it's
I feel like I might have given too much away there, idk. I asked if she knew what I
was talking about and she said she hoped she did. So I have no idea what that means.
See, this is my problem. I tend to give away too much even when I don't want to. I
mean, I told one of my other friends I'd tell her my new crush if it lasted a week.
Guess I didn't think it would! I could always lie and say it hasn't lasted, and hey,
maybe that'll turn out to be true. Because I truly don't want her to know. However, I
want the friend I sent the email to know, or at least to know part of it so she can
be supportive and whatnot. I still don't know if I truly like this girl, hopefully
it'll become apparent soon? Okay, I don't really have much more important to say
here, I'll just be rambling.