Tuesday, 20 September 2011
12:18:38 PM (GMT)
I used to not believe in fate.
I used to not believe in soulmates.
I used to wonder if we all had a soul, or whether that was all in our head.
I used to not believe in love at first site.
That all changed the moment I met Jesse.
I remember the first time I laid eyes on her, the moment frozen in time in my
I was walking past her, and I looked off to my left.
I saw the most beautiful girl I had ever seen.
She was sitting on a table with her legs on the seat.
Her long, dark hair flowing in the wind.
She looked distant, like her mind was in another place.
She looked over to her left, her eyes looked directly into mine.
Those gorgeous brown eyes, with subtle hints of green that you have to search for.
They only met mine for just a fraction of a second, but in my memory, the moment was
in slow motion, it seemed to last hours.
Out of nervousness, I looked away, kept walking forward.
In my mind, the seed was planted.
I never even so much as said a word to her for at least two weeks, but her face never
left my mind.
I thought up grand plans to confront her, these huge romantic schemes to sweep her
off her feet.
I was going to meet her at the joust field, ask her to join me for a turkey leg.
I was going to see her at the great hall, introduce myself and start casual
I would buy her a flower, have it delivered to her in secret and just throw her
random smiles, making her wonder who that mysterious man was.
In the end, I came up with the grandest plan of all.
I got on Facebook and sent her a message that said "Hi. ".
Somehow, it worked.
We started texting, got to know each other.
We met at the park, spent the day talking about random things.
We talked every day, I got to know her very well.
I learned that she was far more amazing than I could have ever thought possible.
She was perfect for me.
I still have trouble realizing it to this day.
Every single thing about her is exactly what I was looking for in a woman.
I have lost all attraction to any other woman.
I find that unless a girl is my close friend, they really just annoy me.
I just need my Firefly, and that's all that matters to me.
I have to believe in fate now.
The way things happened for me, and especially everything that she has been through.
If things hadn't happened exactly the way they did for me, I would have never met
If I hadn't left college when I did, if I hadn't worked at the ren faire, if things
hadn't gone bad between my ex and I, if I had never made a Facebook, if she had never
sent a friend request, I would have never met her.
We both lost a close friend on the exact same day, in the exact same year.
There are far too many things to explain, but it all came together perfectly.
She was at a point in her life where she needed someone there, to support her and
help her face the problems she has had for years.
I was at a point where I had all but given up on love, and life in general.
We needed each other, and the universe brought us together, following a bizarre,
I now appreciate each and every thing that has happened to me, because it led me to
Even the bad things, the painful memories that haunt me most every day, were
necessary so I could find perfection at the right moment.
She has been through far more than me, and her memories haunt me as well, but I hope
she feels the same way.
I now know that we all have a soul, because hers and mine are forever connected.
Without words, even with miles between us, I feel her with me.
I feel her pain, her emotions, her thoughts.
I feel her love deep inside my chest.
I can tell her exactly where her headache is, because I feel it too.
During her time of the month, I have cramps.
She finds that quite amusing.
I don't as much.
She jokes about how bad pregnancy will be for me.
I just tell her I will have to take maternity leave, as well.
I don't care if anyone believes me, it really doesn't make a damn difference in my
life at all.
We are meant to be together, too many strange things had to occur for us to meet.
And now, the things we do together are literally out of this world.
Maybe some day we will write it all down.
But for now, we will just enjoy what we have, and let it blow our minds each and
every time we are together.
Jesse isn't my girlfriend.
She isn't my future wife.
She isn't the future mother of my kids.
She isn't my lover.
She is my Twin Soul.
And we are forever connected in ways that no one will either believe or understand.
I love you Jesse.
Don't ever forget it.
Not that you could anyway.