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This diary entry is written by HannahFan. ( View all entries )
 
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Why am I still here.Category: (general)
Saturday, 8 January 2011
06:59:15 PM (GMT)
I don't know why I am still here. I have absolutely NOTHING left in life to look
forward to. My mother has died, and was not there to help me in my teen years, and
the love of my life has left me. I still love you, and I want you back, but I did
hurt you and if I COULD go back and change what happened that night I would Kendale,
I would. :'( I used to be Honor roll student and a cheerleading, and had a
scholarship to a school, but <- that is all gone now. When I told my father I was Bi
he told me to never come around again, and that he 'disowned' me. I have no home and
have to live with a person who I don't even KNOW! Mom, I do miss you and I am
thinking about what it would be to leave Earth, and go with you right now. Dad, I did
love you, but I hate that you disowned me. How do you think I feel? I used to be
Daddy's little girl, and now you aren't even there for me. My life has just gone
downhill from here and I am lost. I want Kendale to be back, and I want my father to
love me again, and most of all, I just want my Mom. A lot of people can say that they
have always had their mom there for them, but not me. I felt left out as a child when
there would be mother-daughter sleepovers, or parties, or girlscout things. My older
sister knew my mother, and I never did. She always felt bad for me. I would get made
fun of in elementary for having no mother, and that had just torn me, to the part
where I would start throwing punches to get my anger out. :'( I just wish I could
have my life back, and that my life would be normal again, and that my father would
accept me for who I am. My sister lives far away and I can't see her, but she is
there for me, but I never can see her. I have started partying and drinking and my
life has been messed up big time. I sometimes end up in places I don't remember going
to. I just wish that I could see my mother again on Earth, My father WOULD accept as
I am, and that Kendale would come back. :'(

 Mom, I miss and LOVE YOU SO MUCH! :'( I remember that last time I saw you, you told
me to not follow you ways. I'm sorry, but I have somewhat. :'(
Kendale, I still love you, and miss you so much. ♥
Dad, I am bi and will be forever, I just want you to accept me and let me be Daddy's
Little Girl Again. :'(

 ♥ <3

Comments 
ILOVETOFUCKjr says:   8 January 2011   864376  
I'm sorry, I love you. I want you back, and I miss you too. 
 
HannahFan says :   9 January 2011   958112  
I love you too, I want you back too:/
 

 
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