Thursday, 18 March 2010
05:34:57 PM (GMT)
My sister, talked to one today. And to my brother. He came for me.
I am really scared, they won't tell me what he asked, we're going to be taken away, I
feel it. I have to clean now. I'm crying, I've always been scared of social workers,
just hearing the name.
We're not bad people, sure, we have a rough time keeping the house spotless, but it's
decent. We need help, I think I'll see if we can stay at my grandma's for a few days.
It'll help calm my nerves.
It ruins my long weekend, we were going to go to medicine hat to visit our cousin,
and go swimming. I'm traumatized, it's probably nothing. But..
I've always been scared. Always.
I can't think straight, I'm going to clean my room and cry for a little while. I'm
really scared, I haven't been this scared since the police came to our door, when
Trystan was supposed to have a bath, and he threw a fit, and phoned the police. They
threatened to take us away. I cried for months after that. Only in private though.
I really need support, I can't stop the tears this time. Or this awful feeling.
I want to talk, to be held, never to be alone. I'm scared.
Though, it may be nothing, I'm just really scared. There's nothing I can do.
My friend Janae legally can't live with her mom anymore since she was 11yrs old. She
says it was for the better, and even though she hated her mom, I see the deep pain in
I'm a chicken, scared, there's nothing I can do. I wanna die. I wanna be alone, and
yet, all I want is to have a best friend comfort me.
Now I'm shaking, Reyvan's asking what's wrong, and Daeman looks scared of me. I don't
know what to say to them. Reyvan is only eight, she doesn't need to worry. And
Daeman.. He's still a baby. I can't bare thinking about this anymore.
I'm such a coward, I'm really terrified. This is horrible, I'm supposed to be the big
strong figure for my siblings when my parents are gone, and now. I can't. I can't
even make myself stop shaking, or crying. I just can't stand this feeling.
Jayde's not worried, she siad she's happy, and wants to be away from me for forever.
Trystan's not home.
My dad's working. I can't do anything. I think I need to sleep now.
Last edited: 18 March 2010
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