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This diary entry is written by confessionsofawhinygirl. ( View all entries )
 

GET THE FUCK OUTCategory: (general)
Saturday, 15 October 2016
05:52:16 PM (GMT)
Ha, I got you didn't I with the whole I am angsty teenage thing I'm gonna shoot
puppies or skin squirrels or whatever. Truth be told a little confused about this
whole thing. Your telling me I have to go to high school for 4 years to then graduate
and go to university for 8 years (I wanna become a doc) to finally become a
productive member of society. Where you work until you die? Hmm.... No thank you. I'd
rather not. How about a shortcut? Or a loophole? Or a brain full of smarts? Anything
to speed this process along. It feels like forever but it is going by so fast. Faster
than you'd expect.  I feel the grip I have on this world of reality slipping away in
the most dramatic way. I feel without a cause. Like Holden when he walking down the
street. Everything just keeps going and going but not getting anywhere. I want
everything to stop or speed up or something to change. Christ. If only. If only they
saw what I see when I look at them, when I look at this world. Why I feel the way I
do. Only I'll never explain it ot them. Never tell anyone. I'll lock it away make
them suffer. No make them wonder what changed in me. If a light switch was flipped
and like my person it is now dark. Or if I have twin or been body snatched  or have
clone. What changed in that sweet sweet girl that made her so bitter? Was it family
life? Oh that mother poor thing. Or was it her insides. Did they not mush the way
there supposed to? Who the hell I am kidding they wouldn't understand what I see even
if I drew them a picture. I keep thinking how things would be different if little
things if my life never happened.  Like if Alice had never run away to a hole in the
ground? I wouldn't have thought that maybe somehow I could escape too. I found my
hole though. Right there in the sand a beach with no ocean nothing but sand. I stared
for hours at it before deciding it was too small. Without even trying to fit my fat
ass through it. I never try. I always think if something was mean to happen it will.
but it won't. Take it from me a fifteen-year-old high school student. Things don't
come to those who wait. Things come ot those who are brave enough to get up off their
lazy asses and do something. If only I knew how to do that without falling apart. See
i got the plan, I got the look, I got the ambition but have I got the strength? the
will? Tune in next to find out...

Comments 
‹Prince Devitt› says:   16 October 2016   835714  
I like this.
 
YourEddieBear says :   16 October 2016   351160  
lol millennials, always looking for short-cuts
 

 
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