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This diary entry is written by ‹bowie›. ( View all entries )
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SO FUCKING CLOSECategory: (general)
Monday, 11 May 2015
09:49:47 AM (GMT)

ok so this morning i got a call from the shortbread factory asking me if i could go down and see them at 2 which i was totally buzzing about because i'm finally getting somewhere with a full time job in the place i want to be & after a lot of packing and thunder this morning i went down and [even though i got lost finding the right door i was supposed to go in] i sat down and talked to the guy and it was really just explaining the job a bit more and stuff and he wants me to start on monday and this is great because i will finally have the money for the flat and a lot to spare as well [even after electricity and council tax and national insurance etc] i'm still a wee bit sceptical about the job though like it's 10 hours 4 days a week packing shortbread like it's not hard but i've never done a job that intensive before and they're all about speed but i think i can do it and i still need to sort out the flat but nobody else has shown interest in it so that should be ok if i can call them asap i'm still not 100% swayed [it took like 4 attempts to spell that right wtf] but it makes me more comfortable with the decision if my parents are backing it but idk if they are because every time i'm like 'i have an interview' or 'i found a flat' or 'i have this solution' they always sort of bring me down with negatives or things i haven't thought through and yeah i know that's important and realistic but it would be nice if you could still be a little happy i'm putting in the effort to work this out but still one step closer --UPDATE ok so i'm starting to panic like staying in this area was all i was aiming for and now i have this job and i'm looking at this flat it feels like it's working out perfectly except it doesn't? like idk if i'm scared of being alone up here even though i'll [hopefully] be seeing everyone regularly or if i'm concerned about the job and how working in a factory will suit me and then there's all the flat stuff like contents insurance and electricity i have to work out plus i have to ask my parents for help with the deposit which i don't feel comfortable doing and i'm really starting to worry like i know that moving away with my parents would be a lot easier but then i'd have to work to find a job all over again in a new area and i might have the exact same issue plus that means leaving my friends over the summer and going through moving house which i am dreading anyway like the only thing that makes sense for me to do in my opinion is to stay and work through it but for some reason it feels wrong i don't like this at all

Last edited: 11 May 2015

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