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This diary entry is written by XO_lights_out. ( View all entries )

Lake's StoryCategory: (general)
Saturday, 24 May 2014
12:07:58 AM (GMT)
People meet their soulmates in the weirdest ways, whether is at a bar,bumping into
each other, opposite attractions, or  even online,but when you actually get in a
relationship it's a big deal and a lot of work to make it last. It's easy if you and
you're partner are helpimg each other through the good and the bad,and if it's one
sides then that relationship will not last long. It probably wont last a week. My
story is kind of like this.. It's my life. My relationship woes. 
  'I'm breaking up with you n im sorry but this isnt working out.' Yep, thats what my
now ex-boyfriend of nine months text me. I bet you're wondering why he  broke with
me? well it's because he has another chick. Her name is Melinda and they met a few
weeks ago i guess at a restaurant where nathan,my ex, was goung for his uncle's
birthday. Yays! So imagine my surprise when i saw that she called him bae on facebook
some days after that. Was I pissed off? Hell yea. Did I curse him and that bitch out?
Nope. I just simply liked that status just waiting on him to notice that he fucked up
big time. Eventually he noticed,and then we got into blah blah im all bout second
chances so i decided to give him a chance,his last one, to make things right as in
earn my trust. I'm guessing he still with that girl because he wouldnt text me this
without a real good reason. 
  It's okay though I'm gucci. Yes, it hurts a lot,but im not going to let him see my

This is the first part if you like it then comment in my q/a section. I know i'm a
little rusty since i haven't written in a year or so.

Phantom says:   24 May 2014   561127  
dang i ran out of time to get to this on the compy today...but i will
read it properly tomorrow or tonight and comment/critique! *hugs*
XO_lights_out says:   25 May 2014   730976  
thnx n its oki  *hugs back*  pro and cons will most definitely help
me out 
RowMyBoat says:   25 May 2014   936534  
Some will win, some will lose, move on and be a winner
‹Jessie'sBody› says:   25 May 2014   246682  
This is great for a story, but I'm trying to figure out, is it real??
I hope not dear...
XO_lights_out says:   25 May 2014   992652  
no its not real . This is a story that i imagined
XO_lights_out says:   25 May 2014   961635  
‹Scamp› says:   25 May 2014   844893  
I'm really glad it was fiction
XO_lights_out says:   25 May 2014   620526  
Really why?
‹Scamp› says:   25 May 2014   822873  
Because you're a really nice girl 
XO_lights_out says:   25 May 2014   912819  
Thnx ,but  it still happens to people
‹Scamp› says:   26 May 2014   574326  
I know the same shit happened to me once 
XO_lights_out says:   26 May 2014   149458  
Awe im sorry 
‹Scamp› says:   26 May 2014   123025  
S'okay I learnt my lesson don't try and date a party girl she's having
a baby right now today 
XO_lights_out says:   27 May 2014   496194  
Woaho.o didnt see that comin..thats easy advice 
Phantom says:   27 May 2014   641160  
so is this an excerpt from the middle or the actual beginning of the

is the girl (protagonist) called "Lake"? she never actually uses her
name. will this story be in the first person like this most of the

so far it reads like a diary or narrative..but the conflict isnt quite
clear. what is the conflict for your girl? that she has problems
dating? that she loves this guy and wants him back? u need to be
clearer on what her problem is (the problem to be resolved by story's

theres some minor grammatical issues but those can be dealt with in

so far not bad..tighten it up some though and hook the reader right
away...why should the reader care about this girl and what happens to
her? u have to grab the reader and make them care about her...
XO_lights_out says:   28 May 2014   985152  
Its the beginning of the story. Yes, her name is lake. The conflict
is that her boyfriend broke up with her then she finds someone else
which starts a whole new . I will make sure to proofread twice. Thank
you . Im trying to do that i just got to stat getting back to my
writing habit 
Phantom says:   20 June 2014   297856  
post more of it..
XO_lights_out says :   22 June 2014   812436  
I redid the whole thing

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