These are song lyrics that I wrote. Also I included a really deep
poem.
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This diary entry is written by Irosha_Sisuken. ( View all entries )
 
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These are song lyrics that I wrote. Also I included a really deep
poem.
Category: (general)
Thursday, 12 July 2007
03:41:33 AM (GMT)
Disadvantage

No one ever said life would be so unfair.
No one ever told me after a while no one cares.
Nobody ever said I'd have to fend for myself someday.
And no one told me I'd have to find my own way
To live the life I choose

I only wish you'd told me sooner,
Only wish you'd said something straightforward to me.
I only wish I had known sooner
That this is the way my life will soon be.

And I'm being lost to the world outside.
They're ready to leave me behind for the ride.
It's horrible knowing how helpless you are
And how much you have to do to go far,
Before you fail and lose

I only wish you'd told me sooner,
Only wish you'd said something straightforward to me.
I only wish I had known sooner
That this is the way my life will soon be.

It's about time for me to run,
And see if I'm ready or if I'm already done
I think that I can fly, I know I have to try
The wings I bargained for my entire life

I only wish you'd told me sooner,
Only wish you'd said something straightforward to me.
I only wish I had known sooner
That this is the way my life will soon be.


----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------


I hope you liked that! Here's the poem I wrote. It's in three parts, each concerning
an emotion. I should warn you, this contains language and strong, STRONG emotional
distress. It was written at a really difficult time in my life, and I totally
understand if you don't like it, but if you try to understand some of it, you might
find that you like what you're reading.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------


Accuracy.
They never really got it the first time around, did they?
They don’t and won’t understand that I can’t.
I can’t do this and break concentration to do that.
I’ve tried.
There’s so much I’d love to be able to do.
They don’t know that they’ve killed my self confidence.
They don’t know that they’re the reason I’m scared to excel.
They don’t know that they’re the reason that I’m isolated.
They don’t know that I’ll probably die shortly after they do.
They don’t know that something is wrong with me.
Oh, I’ve tried to tell them for years. They never listen.
“You are completely normal, and that’s all you’d ever be!
Why would you be anything else?”
Well surely I don’t know! But there’s something wrong;
Can’t you see that?! Can’t you see that I am NOT normal?!

Direction.
I’ve hidden what and who I really am from you for YEARS.
But of course, if I told you, you’d never believe me.
I’m far too scatterbrained and fucking STUPID.
And yet, I’m the one who knows music better than you. All of you.
I can do so many things you can never do. Ever.
You do NOT know me, and yet you pretend that you do.
I’ve said countless times, I can do it, if you leave me alone to do my own things.
But you won’t leave me alone. You’re leaving HIM the money.
He’s going to use it to gamble away your life savings and go home and beat his
unfortunate wife.
You don’t see that. You never see that. You see a sweet big gentle giant.
You’re stupid.
You don’t see what he does to your youngest daughter when you aren’t around.
She’s afraid to tell you the things he does. He’s scared her into silence.
Fuck you. You’re terrible parents. You don’t know how to raise proper children.
You just scare them until they listen to you. Do everything you say, no one gets
hurt.
Betcha never counted on ME, did you?

Threat.
I’ve tried to warn you.
I’ve tried to be nice about it.
I’ve tried blatant disobedience.
You never listen to my side. You think it’s dumb and makes no sense.
WELL. I say to you, a big fat FUCK YOU. You don’t deserve to have me in this
house.
I’d leave, trust me. But what would you do?
Have you thought about that?
No one to drive your brats to scouts on Thursdays, no one to hate for having nothing
done.
No one to speak contemptfully to.
You NEED me.

Comments 
Elijahlover says:   12 July 2007   893761  
that ways really good I loved it
Irosha_Sisuken says:   12 July 2007   321875  
Thank you, it took a lot out of me when I wrote it, so I'm very glad
you liked it.
rockin_angel911 says:   12 July 2007   998257  
i like the song alot the poem too
Irosha_Sisuken says:   12 July 2007   712713  
Yay! Thank you.
hina says:   12 July 2007   959991  
Seems like some kind of [emotional] rebellion...
I sense lots of bitterness and you must have been through a lot...
Anyways, they are good ^^
 
Irosha_Sisuken says:   12 July 2007   998386  
You got it pretty much on the money. These words are the things I
could never say out loud to my family, but that I thought to myself
every time I was spoken to.
Some things you can't recover from; for those things, poetry is a
great way to try and let out some steam, and that's what I did.
‹►Lord♪The♪Đestroyer♪of♪Đreams◄› says:   5 April 2011   687565  
ughhh so guys i dont know what to do
i got this job at disney and dont get me wrong, i love being there
but the shit im going through to BE there is killing me
already i have to find someone to cover two of my shifts for next week
and the
manager didnt even look at the papers i gave her to show her what i
needed off in
this and next week
the request sheet is ridiculous bc you have to have the entire next
month done by
the fifteenth of this month otherwise youre out of luck
i think im leaving
i got an interview with icing/claires
and they want me to be a part-time MANAGER
which sounds a lot better than fucking myself over with disney
so i think im going to get out while i can
do you think that i could actually make it as a part-time manager, or
is this a lost
cause before i shoot for it?
 
‹►Lord♪The♪Đestroyer♪of♪Đreams◄› says:   5 April 2011   289335  
ughhh so guys i dont know what to do
i got this job at disney and dont get me wrong, i love being there
but the shit im going through to BE there is killing me
already i have to find someone to cover two of my shifts for next week
and the
manager didnt even look at the papers i gave her to show her what i
needed off in
this and next week
the request sheet is ridiculous bc you have to have the entire next
month done by
the fifteenth of this month otherwise youre out of luck
i think im leaving
i got an interview with icing/claires
and they want me to be a part-time MANAGER
which sounds a lot better than fucking myself over with disney
so i think im going to get out while i can
do you think that i could actually make it as a part-time manager, or
is this a lost
cause before i shoot for it?
 
‹►Lord♪The♪Đestroyer♪of♪Đreams◄› says :   5 April 2011   122029  
ughhh so guys i dont know what to do
i got this job at disney and dont get me wrong, i love being there
but the shit im going through to BE there is killing me
already i have to find someone to cover two of my shifts for next week
and the
manager didnt even look at the papers i gave her to show her what i
needed off in
this and next week
the request sheet is ridiculous bc you have to have the entire next
month done by
the fifteenth of this month otherwise youre out of luck
i think im leaving
i got an interview with icing/claires
and they want me to be a part-time MANAGER
which sounds a lot better than fucking myself over with disney
so i think im going to get out while i can
do you think that i could actually make it as a part-time manager, or
is this a lost
cause before i shoot for it?
 
 
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