One in every four Americans has some form of mental illness. Think of your three best friends. If they're okay, than
There's a fine line between fishing and just standing on the shore like an idiot.
A good time to keep your mouth shut is when you're in deep water.
People have the right to be stupid, but some abuse that privilege.
Join the army, meet interesting people, kill them.
Laugh alone and the world thinks you're an idiot.
Free advice is worth what you paid for it.
My opinions may have changed, but not the fact that I am right.
Always remember, three out of four people make up 75 percent of the population.
If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked something.
The quickest way of ending a war is to lose it.
To talk without thinking is to shoot without aiming.
No problem is so big and complicated that it can't be ran away from.
Age is a question of mind over matter. If you don't mind, it don't matter.
If you believe in telekinesis, raise my hands.
If you want people to know where you stand, wear the same socks for two weeks.
The shortest distance between two points is how far apart they are.
When all is said and done, much more is said than done.
There are only three kinds of people; people who can count and people who can't.
Nothing is foolproof to a sufficiently talented fool.
Anywhere is walking distance, if you've got the time.
Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys.
One of the advantages of being disorderly is that one is constantly making exciting discoveries.
You probably wouldn't worry about what people think of you if you could know how seldom they do.
Never judge a book by it's movie.
We spend the first twelve months of our children's lives teaching them to walk and talk and the next twelve telling them
to sit down and shut up.
The trouble with the rat-race is that even if you win, you're still a rat.
A conclusion is simply the place where you got tired of thinking.
Children seldom misquote you. In fact, they usually repeat word for word what you shouldn't have said.
Education is what you get from reading the fine print. Experience is what you get from not reading it.
Traffic signals in New York are just rough guidelines.
For people who like peace and quiet - a phoneless cord.
The easiest way to find something lost around the house is to buy a replacement.
There are two kinds of pedestrians--the quick and the dead.
Some people are going to leave a mark on this world, while others will leave a stain.
Before you criticize someone, walk a mile in their shoes. That way you're a mile away, and you have their shoes too.
The early bird gets the worm, but the early worm gets eaten.
If you can smile when things go wrong, you have someone in mind to blame.
Never wrestle with a pig: You both get all dirty, and the pig likes it.
Never argue with an idiot. They drag you down to their level then beat you with experience