Iv been on this earth for 15 years. So dont ask my age.
I’m pessimistic, but that’s the price of knowing the truth. I’m
okay with that, by the way. I don’t know what it’s like to have
fancy clothes and a bunch of friends, but I do know what it’s like
to work for my things and keep tight with the people I know best. I
have an extensive vocabulary, and I’m not afraid to display that.
I’m comfortable with being myself around whoever I’m talking to. I
am a Satanist, but that doesn’t mean I drink blood and sacrifice
children. I think before I talk. I’ll be watching my back 24/7, just
because I know someone’s going to try to stab me in it. I don’t
trust that easily, it’s not because I’m paranoid, it’s just
because I’m not willing to waste my time.
I don’t do drugs, and I don’t drink, anymore. The idea of drugs,
in my opinion, is to let you experiment with your own thoughts, and
experience them in a different way. I used to be the worst junkie, and
I'm upset that I didn't hold back when I should've. I was addicted to
the drug, physically, but mentally, I was addicted the feeling I would
recieve, and the thoughts I could create whilst being fucked up. Once
my dealer died from his 6th overdose, I decided to call it quitsies.
Shortly after, I realized how much the idea of drugs has been
exploited. Nowadays it's the rebellious thing to do, and you're going
to have tons of friends because of it. I hated that idea, and I was
glad I got out of my habbit. Better late than never.
I'm probably not the nicest person you'll ever meet, but I can say
that I'm a generally nice person. I really guess that's up to you
though, because everyone's going to percieve me as something
different, and I'm guessing not everybody's going to think I'm a
perfect little princess who's nice to everybody. I don't care about
what people think of themselves, and I'm probably the worst person to
come to, to pull your self esteem back into order. When I give a
compliment it's genuine, and most often.. not really often. I believe
I should concentrate on my opinion of myself, before I start caring
about what people's opinions of THEMSELVES are.
I only live to impress myself. I can not, will not, and could never
change myself just to please somebody. I look the way I look, because
I like the way I look. Not because I want to "fit in" with a certain
culture. I take care of myself, because I like looking nice. Not
because I want other people to think I look nice. In all honesty, I
don't care what your opinion is of me, I just care about mine. By the
way, I only share anything about myself with you because maybe we
could find a connection and socialize. I love doing that. The one
thing I want more than anything, in the entire world, is to have a
100% full connection with one person. It makes me sad to know that
it's never going to happen because there isn't a single other me out
there in this world. It's a lonely thought, but I deal with it. I have
clinical depression, but I don't let that stop me from living my life
to the expectations I set for myself. Of course there are days when I
just don't wanna do a thing, that's natural, but I'll buck up and
figure out a way to get through the day. Depression doesn't stop me
from being happy. It just makes it more difficult to achieve. And I'm
fine with having to work to achieve happiness. To be honest, I know
somebody reads this but.. I can't be sure who. Maybe one day I'll find
a person who reads everything I've written, and makes a comment about
it. Whether it be positive or negative, I'm open to hear it. I plan to
do something with my life, and if you’re going to get in the way, I
suggest that you leave. Talk shit, get hit. Spew lies, spit blood.
im the one on the right