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35 F United States of America
speaks English
Last login: 14 June 2009
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Member since: 14 June 2009
Iv been on this earth for 15 years. So dont ask my age. I’m pessimistic, but that’s the price of knowing the truth. I’m okay with that, by the way. I don’t know what it’s like to have fancy clothes and a bunch of friends, but I do know what it’s like to work for my things and keep tight with the people I know best. I have an extensive vocabulary, and I’m not afraid to display that. I’m comfortable with being myself around whoever I’m talking to. I am a Satanist, but that doesn’t mean I drink blood and sacrifice children. I think before I talk. I’ll be watching my back 24/7, just because I know someone’s going to try to stab me in it. I don’t trust that easily, it’s not because I’m paranoid, it’s just because I’m not willing to waste my time. I don’t do drugs, and I don’t drink, anymore. The idea of drugs, in my opinion, is to let you experiment with your own thoughts, and experience them in a different way. I used to be the worst junkie, and I'm upset that I didn't hold back when I should've. I was addicted to the drug, physically, but mentally, I was addicted the feeling I would recieve, and the thoughts I could create whilst being fucked up. Once my dealer died from his 6th overdose, I decided to call it quitsies. Shortly after, I realized how much the idea of drugs has been exploited. Nowadays it's the rebellious thing to do, and you're going to have tons of friends because of it. I hated that idea, and I was glad I got out of my habbit. Better late than never. I'm probably not the nicest person you'll ever meet, but I can say that I'm a generally nice person. I really guess that's up to you though, because everyone's going to percieve me as something different, and I'm guessing not everybody's going to think I'm a perfect little princess who's nice to everybody. I don't care about what people think of themselves, and I'm probably the worst person to come to, to pull your self esteem back into order. When I give a compliment it's genuine, and most often.. not really often. I believe I should concentrate on my opinion of myself, before I start caring about what people's opinions of THEMSELVES are. I only live to impress myself. I can not, will not, and could never change myself just to please somebody. I look the way I look, because I like the way I look. Not because I want to "fit in" with a certain culture. I take care of myself, because I like looking nice. Not because I want other people to think I look nice. In all honesty, I don't care what your opinion is of me, I just care about mine. By the way, I only share anything about myself with you because maybe we could find a connection and socialize. I love doing that. The one thing I want more than anything, in the entire world, is to have a 100% full connection with one person. It makes me sad to know that it's never going to happen because there isn't a single other me out there in this world. It's a lonely thought, but I deal with it. I have clinical depression, but I don't let that stop me from living my life to the expectations I set for myself. Of course there are days when I just don't wanna do a thing, that's natural, but I'll buck up and figure out a way to get through the day. Depression doesn't stop me from being happy. It just makes it more difficult to achieve. And I'm fine with having to work to achieve happiness. To be honest, I know somebody reads this but.. I can't be sure who. Maybe one day I'll find a person who reads everything I've written, and makes a comment about it. Whether it be positive or negative, I'm open to hear it. I plan to do something with my life, and if you’re going to get in the way, I suggest that you leave. Talk shit, get hit. Spew lies, spit blood. im the one on the right

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